CW Blueprints for Parents

PASTOR EDDIE IN THE HOUSE!!!

2012-02-10T11:01:00.000-08:00

This Sunday we're mixing things up a bit! Pastor Kevin will be preaching in the adult service and Pastor Eddie will be filling in for the C.W. Playhouse service! It will be a special BGMC service focusing on the country of Iceland and Pastor Eddie is excited to share some personal information he has about this Northern country.

This will also be the week we launch our annual KID VID VETO by passing out sponsor forms, so encourage your kids to be ready to start gathering support for our biggest missions fund-raiser of the year! The actual fasting of entertainment media will begin on Feb. 26th!

And parents, prepare to be challenged by Pastor Kevin in the adult service on this subject as well!

See you Sunday!

My Child Is Just Going Through The Motions

2012-02-10T10:59:00.000-08:00

Sometimes children learn to go through the motions to just get through a discipline experience. They'll parrot the answers that they know you want to hear. You know that helping them change their hearts is the right thing to do, but you don't seem to be getting anywhere. What do you do?

"The answer must be bigger consequences." That tends to be what parents think of first, but the solution is usually more complicated. The key may be adding positive consequences that help children practice a heart change.

One mom said, "My twelve-year-old son was struggling with meanness. I had tried taking away privileges but that didn't seem to work. I decided to try something different. I told him each day to find three kind things he could do for his brother. He would have to report to me before he was free to go out and play. By focusing on the positive we began seeing some significant change."

This is a good idea but sometimes change is slow or doesn't seem to be there at all. In these cases, parents must take a two-pronged approach. First, set up a good routine and enforce it consistently. It's like a Jello mold. You're establishing boundaries for children and requiring right responses even though they don't seem to be able to assimilate change on a deeper level.

Then pray. After all, God is the one who can change a heart. Pray that your children will respond to the discipline and guidelines you set up. Tell your children that you're praying for them. Don't give up and just let them go. Continue to set the patterns and routines to be that container that they need to act rightly. Pray that God will breathe life into the container so that children aren't just acting right, but their hearts are in it too.

Look for small opportunities for dialogue, modeling, and correction that God might use to help them change. Find positive influences for your child. It's amazing how many times a youth leader at church can say the very same thing that you are saying at home but your kids will receive it better from someone else. Hang in there. The job of parenting requires a lot of faith and work. Both are necessary to help children make changes that will last.

This tip comes from the book, Parenting is Heart Work, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Stuffed Animal Theme Night tomorrow in Awana!

2012-01-31T15:02:00.000-08:00

Remind your kids to bring the BIGGEST stuffed animal they have in their collection and maybe a couple extra to share with friends! Tomorrow night they will get extra credit points for the color team with the most GIANT stuffed animals but they are limited to ONE PER CLUBBER. So they can only get credit for one of their giant animals unless they share it with a friend on their team who maybe doesn't have a stuffed animal that large.

Pastor Kevin will be looking at how many team members are holding a stuffed toy of any size... but the bigger the animal, the more potential value it will add!

Of course, don't forget the basics that often win the contest without the bonus points anyway: ATTENDANCE, BEING ON TIME, WEARING UNIFORMS, MEMORIZING SECTIONS, BRINGING A BIBLE AND AN OFFERING ETC.

Stop the Intensity in Conflict

2012-01-31T15:00:00.000-08:00

Sometimes a child's stubbornness or defiance is obvious. In those moments, stop dealing with the issue at hand and talk about the process of how you're relating. "I can tell you're upset and it's not good for us to continue until you settle down. You need to take a break and come back when you're ready to continue talking about this." Have the child sit in the hall or on the top step or some other boring place. After the child has settled down, then he or she needs to come back to you and talk about the problem.

If your child comes back without having a heart change, then send the child back again. One dad told the story of seven-year-old Sarah who was yelling at her brother. "I called her upstairs to talk to me about it and she began yelling at me. I told her that was inappropriate and to take a break for a bit and settle down.

About a minute later she came back but was obviously not changed. Her head was tilted down, her posture was slumping and her bottom lip was sticking out. I didn't even have to talk with her. I just told her what I saw, "Sarah, I can tell you're not ready yet. The way you're standing and the expression on your face all tell me that you still have a problem in your heart. I want you to go back until you're ready to come out with a changed heart.

"This time she stayed away for about 20 minutes and when she returned she was obviously different. In fact, I took her head in my hands and looked deep into her eyes and said, 'I can see your heart in there. It looks pretty nice right now. It looks like you're ready to talk about this.' Sarah giggled and then we continued to talk about the problem. I explained to her that she could not yell at her dad. That is disrespectful even if she is angry. We also talked about the right responses she could have if she was angry with her brother."

By enforcing a break, this dad helped Sarah change her heart. Don't allow conflict to escalate into a battle. Stop the intensity with a break. It will not only help you stay calm but it will help your children develop some maturity about dealing with conflict.

What are some ways you've seen the Break work in your family?

This tip comes from the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

BGMC SUNDAY!! $2 in your Buddy Barrel gets a prize from the Prize Box!

2012-01-27T16:20:00.001-08:00

THIS SUNDAY IS BGMC SUNDAY! REMIND YOUR KIDS TO BRING IN THEIR BUDDY BARRELS! ANY CHILD WHO BRINGS AT LEAST $2.00 IN THEIR BARREL GETS TO GO IN PK'S PRIZE BOX!!

Also: This week the kids will learn the difference between Ritual and Ethical laws in the Old Testament Law of Moses. We will have games and activities to make it memorable along with Buck Denver and company! Join us at 10:30am, Sunday Morning!

Awana Tonight starts at 6:15pm & This Sunday is BGMC Sunday!

2012-01-25T11:05:00.000-08:00

Another Awana club night! Don't forget we begin at 6:15pm now so try to get the kids to church just a bit earlier so they can get their full points for the evening.

ALSO: This Sunday is our first BGMC Sunday of this year and to encourage a good start on the year, we're offering every child who brings at least $2.00 in their Buddy Barrel this Sunday an opportunity to go in Pastor Kevin's prize box!

Launching Your Child's Faith: Too Hard or Too Scary?

2012-01-25T10:58:00.000-08:00

Marilyn's parents seemed satisfied when they coached her to pray the "sinner's prayer" at age five. Her mother hugged her, calling it a "great moment" in the girl's life — and it certainly seemed like it was! She'd said the "right" words, after all.

But Marilyn's heart wasn't in this journey. Her interest in Christianity had begun and ended with that prayer. By the time she was a teenager, she hated her life. Today she's turned her back on the "fundamentalism" of her childhood, vowing to spend the rest of her days learning to "be herself."

As Marilyn's story demonstrates, the goal of faith-launching is to cultivate an eternal, personal relationship with God. It's not just to get our child to say words that make us relax or feel better.

That's not to say that "praying the prayer" or having a specific "launch day" isn't important. The act of believing in Jesus, wanting forgiveness for sins, and saying so is an indispensable beginning.

But ignoring the rest of the flight plan can lead to shortcuts that endanger your "astronaut." Parents who aim only to hear the "right words" from a very young child may be tempted to "get this out of the way" as if it were an awkward talk about the birds and the bees. They may fail to supply their kids with enough information as they grow up to make a real, lasting choice. To use a more biblical word picture, they may build a house on sand, not rock.

Launchpad Jitters
"Hey," you might say. "Aren't you supposed to be encouraging me? I'm already nervous about this faith-launching stuff, and you're just telling me all the things that can go wrong."

Sorry. If you're anxious about helping your child become a Christian, it's understandable. You may think it's all up to you. You may think that if you "fail," the launch window will slam shut and no one will ever be able to reach your child.

Or perhaps you're more worried about how this process might affect your relationship with your son or daughter. What if your child rejects you for acting "weird" when you try to bring up "spiritual things"? What if he or she won't "go along" when you ask for a decision about following Jesus? Will things get awkward — or worse?

Let's look at seven common faith-launching worries parents face — and why you don't have to feel overwhelmed by them.

I'm not an expert on Christianity. Good! That means you'll be able to talk with your child in plain English, not theological jargon. If you don't quite grasp concepts like the Trinity and original sin, relax. Use a resource like FaithLaunch, which describes them as simply as possible so that you can do the same for your child.

My own relationship with God isn't going too well. If you believe the basics — that we can receive forgiveness by placing our faith in Christ — you're qualified to address the subject with your child. It's important to deal with your doubts, disappointments, and temptations with the help of a pastor or other mature believer, but waiting for perfection isn't necessary. In fact, you might even find the process to be a faith-builder for you.

My kid has the attention span of a Chihuahua on caffeine. Are you afraid of boring your child? Whether the cause is ADHD or just too many video games, a short attention span doesn't have to torpedo your takeoff. FaithLaunch is one program that features a wide variety of brief activities, not a bunch of lectures. You can take things at your child's pace, and in bite-sized pieces.

I'm no teacher. Fortunately, this doesn't have to be a class. It can be a series of family times — kind of a cross between game night, a devotional, and baking cookies together. You're the leader, but there's no standing at a chalkboard and delivering a memorized lesson. It's as natural as spending time with your child to play with the cat, listen to a song on the radio, or work together on a model plane.

I have to do this alone. If you're a single parent, or if you're married but your spouse is reluctant to help, you may need to lead as a team of one. No, make that two: God knows all about your situation. In the case of FaithLaunch, family times have been prepared with you in mind; you won't be required to do anything a mom or dad can't do. If you really need flesh-and-blood support, though, you might consider inviting a friend and his or her child to join you.

My kid doesn't seem interested in God. If you haven't talked with your child much about faith before, suddenly immersing yourselves in the subject may seem jarring. You may assume your child isn't interested, yet it's likely he or she has questions but hasn't raised them. Rather than leaping in headlong, you might prepare your child for a couple of weeks beforehand by occasionally asking questions of your own ("Who do you think gave that caterpillar all those legs?") and mentioning your own faith ("I'll be sure to pray about your spelling test tomorrow").

I'm afraid I'll do it wrong and I'll never have another chance. The good news is that there are a million ways to do it right. You can blend a resource like FaithLaunch with your personality, your child's interests, your family's schedule, your home's layout, your favorite snacks. Share the truths in your own words, and let your child respond without insisting on the "right" answer.

Count on the all-powerful God to use your less-than-perfect efforts — in His own time. When it comes to launch windows, He's able to open a lot more than doors.

Adapted from FaithLaunch: A Simple Plan to Ignite Your Child's Love for Jesus by John Trent, Ph.D., and Jane Vogel (Focus on the Family/Tyndale, 2008)

Kids Enjoy Special Tabernacle Walk-thru During Kids Church!

2012-01-17T11:23:00.000-08:00

This last Sunday, we took the kids on a tour of the Wilderness Tabernacle turning the C.W. Playhouse into the Tabernacle & courtyard.

Below on the right was our mock Altar of sacrifice and on the left our Laver of cleansing.

The Tabernacle is made of puppet staging, but we tried to give the idea of the 4 layers used to cover the tabernacle here on the front.

Inside, we showed the table of show bread, the altar of incense and the golden lamp stand.

And of course, our Ark of the Covenant inside the Holy of Holies on the other side of the Temple Veil (The only thing we had in the right colors was a Tremper blanket. Thank goodness we're under the new covenant.)

Launching Your Child's Faith: What's the Rush?

2012-01-17T11:14:00.000-08:00

Now is the time for you to realize the incredible impact you can have on your child, helping him or her come to Christ and grow in that relationship.

You've never been so nervous in your life.

The relentless Florida sun glints off the crystal of your wristwatch as you glance at it for the thousandth time. Didn't you see these numbers, 11:04 a.m., half an hour ago? History is crawling forward. Half of you wants it to speed up, but the other half wants the clock to stop entirely.

Your stomach grips again as you squint into the distance. For nearly four hours your son has been perched on top of the otherworldly object that towers like a white-and-rust castle against the sapphire sky.

You swallow, and wait. And wait.

Finally a voice comes from the PA system. "T minus 30," it says. And eventually, "T minus 15 . . . 10 . . . 9 . . . 8 . . . 7 . . ."

You can't remember your own name now. Your mind is too full of your son's face, the one in his third-grade school picture with the half-combed hair.

"We're ready for main engine start!" says the voice from Mission Control.

At this point there should be a roar, then a rush of flame.

But instead there's . . . silence.

No liftoff. No reaching for the stars.

The astronauts have been dressed for the part. The space shuttle and booster rockets look great on the outside.

But no one loaded any fuel into the tanks, or linked the computers, or actually made any preparations to send your son into space.

Everyone had great intentions.

But it's a failure to launch.

* * *

Unfortunately, in too many homes of parents who know and love Jesus, that picture closely resembles what happens when kids grow up and are ready to "launch out" on their own.

Depending on which study you want to quote, anywhere from 50 to 70 percent of children from evangelical Christian families won't embrace the faith as their own when they leave for college. That's tragic. When it comes to faith transference, we're losing the next generation.

Let me shoot straight: It's not the churches' fault. I think the level of ministry excellence in churches today—for the two hours or so that a family is in the building — has never been higher! The music and PowerPoint presentations and kids' and youth programs are light years ahead of where they've been in the past. Yet more and more young people are never getting off the launch pad when it comes to personally accepting Christ and growing in their faith.

Here's one reason why.

Recently I asked several hundred parents of younger children at a large church three questions.

"Do you think it's important to pass down your faith to your children?" As you might expect, more then 90 percent said, "Yes! It's very important!"
"Do you think your child will have a strong faith when he or she gets out of college?" Again, 90 percent of those responding said, "You bet!"
"Outside of going to church, what are you doing intentionally to introduce and build a growing faith in your child?" Fewer than 30 percent were doing anything purposefully to meet that goal during the 166 hours a week their children were at home.
Think about that. These wonderful, godly, well-intentioned parents strongly believed they should be involved in their children's faith development. They also were highly confident that their children would embrace the faith by the time they were on their own. But when it came to actually preparing their kids, they were just dressing them up and dropping them off at church — and setting themselves up for a failure to launch.

But that doesn't have to be true in your home.

Now is the time for you to realize the incredible impact you can have on your child, helping him or her come to Christ and grow in that relationship. You can do it!

It's not rocket science to help your child reach God's best for his or her life. It's small things, even fun things. They'll go a long way toward filling up those boosters that lift your son or daughter into a lifelong faith.

The Launch Window Is Now
Maybe you've heard the statistics. Researchers agree that most people who receive Christ as Savior do so when they're children.

The message to parents has seemed clear enough: Now's the time for you to invest in your child coming to faith. And the best place for that to happen is right in your home. One survey found that half of those who received Christ by age 12 did so at the prompting of their parents, with an added 20 percent following the lead of another relative or friend.

No matter how wonderful your church may be, most successful launches happen at or near home. That doesn't have to scare you, even if you're a first-generation Christian like me. I didn't grow up in a Christian home, so I never saw anyone model faith transference. My wife, Cindy, didn't see an active, growing faith displayed in her home, either.

Yet both our children know and love the Lord today, as one finishes graduate school and the other gets ready for college. We truly believe it's because we did — without knowing how or why — many of the things you'll find in the FaithLaunch program.

Cindy and I didn't "launch" our relationship with Christ when we were children. Our own stories prove that children can accept the Lord when they're at voting age or older. So if your older child doesn't respond to God's invitation before adulthood, the story may be far from over.

Still, the benefits of following Jesus begin in this life. Since you want the best for your child, you want him or her to start receiving those benefits as soon as possible. Children face more challenges today then ever, and at a younger age; introducing them to Christ now, while they're young, is the most important gift you can give them.

It will be an incredible blessing to you as well. The aging apostle John said this about his spiritual children: "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth" (3 John 4). That's true for any parent of older or grown children who sees them making good decisions and living a life of faith and love for Christ.

Adapted from FaithLaunch: A Simple Plan to Ignite Your Child's Love for Jesus by John Trent, Ph.D., and Jane Vogel (Focus on the Family/Tyndale, 2008)

The Tabernacle: Symbol of Jesus!

2012-01-13T21:11:00.000-08:00

This Sunday in the Playhouse, we'll be exploring the Wilderness Tabernacle through a multi-media presentation mixed with a hands-on representation of the Tabernacle of the Israelites during the time of Moses. Kids will help us build a very rough replica of the tabernacle and all of its articles and then learn how each of those items of worship pointed ahead to Jesus as the Messiah. It's actually a fascinating study and kinda deep stuff, but we're going to break it down so even a Kindergartener will understand it. So make sure you ask your kids what they learned this week in kids church. Who knows, you may even learn a thing or two yourself. :D

Faith Launch: Ignite Your Child's Love for Jesus!

2012-01-13T21:00:00.000-08:00

You're about to discover a fun, easy way to do one of the most important things in the world. It's FaithLaunch: A Simple Plan to Ignite Your Child's Love for Jesus by John Trent and Jane Vogel.

FaithLaunch isn't the only method for introducing your child to Jesus, of course. But it's a good way to do it without pressuring your child, exhausting yourself, or upending your family's schedule. Each of the 13 "Family Times" takes about 30 to 45 minutes; that's 30 to 45 minutes of togetherness, not tedium. You might use one Family Time each week for 90 days — or bits and pieces over a longer period. You get to decide, because FaithLaunch is flexible.

The goal is to prepare your child to begin a relationship with God. Since so many children receive Christ as Savior when they're 4 to 7 years old, each Family Time is written with that age group in mind. But shifting gears for kids ages 8 to 12 is easy; just use the optional activities.

FaithLaunch gives you plenty of fun ways to learn, including three Adventures in Odyssey episodes to listen to. You'll sculpt with clay, stage a treasure hunt, even tell a story with the help of your child's action figures or dolls. If you need an excuse to play with your child, here it is! And if you need permission to talk about what's important, that's here, too.

The plan for each Family Time is easy to follow. Your goal is clear, and the items you'll need are listed — right down to snacks you might enjoy. To boost your confidence, things you might say are spelled out in bold type — with answers to questions in parentheses. And you're always free to adapt the plan to fit you and your child.

There's a bonus, too — another confidence booster. In Part III of the book you'll find answers to questions your child might ask about God, the Bible, Jesus, joining God's family, and more. So there's no need to panic if your child wants to know something that isn't on the tip of your tongue!

Adapted from FaithLaunch: A Simple Plan to Ignite Your Child's Love for Jesus by John Trent, Ph.D., and Jane Vogel (Focus on the Family/Tyndale, 2008)

NEW TIMES FOR AWANA CLUBS!!

2012-01-11T08:39:00.001-08:00

Remember that starting tonight, Awana begins at 6:15pm and ends at 8:15pm!

So do your best to get your kids to church a bit early tonight. Remember, your kids get extra points for being on time every week and the whole point for doing this is to allow our teachers the extra time to cover every clubber's advancement efforts. More time can only improve our clubbers experience on club nights and we're excited to be able to do that! See you (earlier) tonight!

Sleepover Safety: What Every Parent Should Ask Ahead of Time

2012-01-11T08:36:00.000-08:00

"I’m embarrassed to ask this…what will they think of me?"

This is what many parents told us when we talked about the importance of asking “safety questions” of another parent or friend before sending kids off to a play date, sleep over or sports practice.

With all of the stories in the media about “trusted adults” in childrens' lives who have broken that trust by abusing them, it's important to ask yourself whether your discomfort with asking safety questions are more important than your child's safety. Is the chance of offending someone worth the risk?

Perhaps a year ago you might not have even thought to ask, but with recent news events, you probably have heard that 90% of the time a child is harmed - it's by someone they know. As a result, it's nearly impossible to bury your head in the sand and say "that would never happen to my child"…because it can and it does.

We want parents to feel that they have done all in their power to keep their children safe. So here are some questions that are important to ask the people you entrust with your child:

Before a play date or sleep-over

Who will be watching the children?
Do you have older children and will they or their friends be present?
Do you have a gun in your house?
What safety rules do you have in your house?
Will you be staying at your house the entire time?
Is the TV and Internet use monitored?
What are the sleeping arrangements?
Asking these questions will not entirely ensure that your child will be safe, but how the adult answers the questions is very important. Are they offended? Do they tell you that you are too over-protective? Are they giving you the answers that make you feel that your child will be in a safe environment? Is your gut telling you that it's not a safe environment for your child?

Here are some conversations to have with your child:

Your body is special and belongs to you.
You are in charge of your body and nobody should touch you in any way that makes you feel confused, weird, uncomfortable or on your private parts.
You should not touch or look at anyone’s privates.
When over a friend’s house clothes must always stay on.
No one should take pictures of your privates or show you pictures of naked people.
No playing in the master bedroom.
No one should ever ask you to keep a secret from us - or keep a secret that you are NEVER allowed to tell.
It's important to let your child know that you will always believe them and praise them when they report unsafe situations to you. You can give them a few strategies (as well as model and role play situations) so your child will know what to do and how to respond if they feel uncomfortable.

Make sure you discuss your safety rules and the fact that they should be followed when you are at another’s house. Finally, consider having a code word your child can say to you over the phone so if your child wants to leave they don’t have to be embarrassed.

By tackling these issues, you open the door to conversations that should be had on a regular basis as a natural part of your parenting. If all parents start speaking the same language of safety and are willing to openly discuss these questions, children everywhere will be safer. So are you still embarrassed to ask these questions? If you answered yes…get over it or keep them home! Nothing is more important than your child’s safety!

For more information visit our website www.kidsafefoundation.org

First the Holidays... Now Family Week... Then...The Promised Land!

2012-01-03T14:55:00.000-08:00

There are just a few more days of quiet following the holidays before the 2012 storm hits! No I'm not talking about the political storm of an election year, though this year may prove rather chaotic on that front. No, I'm talking about the 2012 SPIRITUAL REVIVAL that we're smelling in the air as we transition from one year into the next and look forward to all that God is doing in our midst. Are you ready to conquer the Promised Land with us? The kids will be learning about Spiritual Warfare as we move from Moses to Joshua this year in the C.W. Playhouse. Let’s show them how we follow our Lord to victory even today!

One Family Service on New Year's Day at 10:30am!

2011-12-30T10:02:00.001-08:00

OK, so it won't exactly be a party like this picture, but it will follow all the parties on New Year's Eve... so consider this a reminder not to party too hard on Saturday night so that you can start the new year off right with worship of the King and gathering with His people to honor Him and lift one another up! We're only having one service and it's the later one, so hopefully we can all get enough sleep and show up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed!

See you Next Year! (10 and a half hours in...)

Celebrate Christmas with Your Church Family this Sunday

2011-12-22T10:25:00.000-08:00

Christmas is on Sunday this year and what better gift to give Jesus on HIS birthday then to gather together with the saints and worship Him? There will be only one service on Christmas day at 10:30pm so it's late enough that everyone should have time to wake up and open those Christmas presents (especially if you have little ones who wake you up at 5am to do so) and maybe even sit down to a nice family breakfast, if that is your tradition, before dressing in your Sunday best and coming to a real CHRIST MASS! Because of the family nature of Christmas, we will not have Kids Church, but we do have a special gift for every child who comes Christmas morning with mom and dad, so don't let them stay home with their new toys! Take a short break and explain to them that, like the shepherds and magi, we are going to go and worship the King.

And remember the message of last Sunday's puppet skit...the only gift we can really give Jesus is our hearts and our worship... and it IS His birthday after all.

See you on Christmas morning!

Christmas: A Time to Practice Saying Thank You

2011-12-22T10:18:00.000-08:00

Gratefulness is an important life quality because it helps us to be thankful for what we have instead of complaining about what we don't have. Gratefulness is a lifestyle but it starts by saying "Thank you" to others who bless us.

Begin now to prepare your children for receiving gifts. Talk about the importance of the giver, not just the gift. Teach children to look at the nametag first so they can be thinking of the person who gave the gift while they open it. Encourage children to express thanks to the giver, even if that person is not in the room at the time. A phone call to extended family or a thank you note to a distant friend can mean a lot.

Gift receiving sometimes provides that awkward moment when we want to ask, "What is this?" or discover that we already have one of these. Play a "What if" game with children to help them anticipate how they might say thank you in those times.

Opening gifts can happen fast and then children are off playing with new toys and games. Helping them to take time to express gratefulness can extend the true meaning of Christmas past the few hours of Christmas Day. And don't forget to take time to thank the Lord for his special gift in Jesus Christ for us.

Learn more about heart qualities like gratefulness in the book Parenting is Heart Work by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Last Awana club of 2011: Biblical Christmas Theme Night!

2011-12-20T12:55:00.002-08:00

Tomorrow is our last Awana club of the year! Don't miss out! The club directors are planning all kinds of fun holiday festivities and we're doing another special theme night: BIBLICAL CHRISTMAS THEME NIGHT! Remind your kids to dress up in Bible clothes associated with the birth of Jesus... Shepherds, Wise Men, Angels, even Roman soldiers! It'll be a great night. See you then!

Retraining the Heart

2011-12-20T12:55:00.001-08:00

It’s amazing how transparent children can be when you take time to actively hear what they have to say. After listening for a while, it’s often possible to identify some key thinking errors that perpetuate the child’s problems.

Take some time to study your children. What weaknesses do they have? What lies do they believe? What are some of the unproductive things they’re saying in their hearts? It can be helpful to simply make observations and write them down.

Ask yourself: What does he say when he’s arguing with me? What does she say when she’s angry? What does he mumble under his breath in his room or as he stomps down the hall? How does she report offenses to her friends? How does she rationalize and justify her mistakes? As you listen to your child talk, you’ll get a bigger picture of beliefs, values, and impressions that are guiding behavior.

Matthew 12:34 says, “out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” As you learn to listen to your child’s heart, identify target areas that you sense are a problem. Behavior indicates what’s happening inside, so when you see a particular weakness, jot it down on a piece of paper. You might list things like procrastination, pride, fear, gloom and doom, or lack of confidence.

You’ve probably known these character weaknesses were causing problems. By identifying the misconceptions at the root of the behavior, you’ll be ready to do some deeper work in your child’s heart. Once you identify a heart issue that concerns you, then you can develop a strategy or action plan to help your child grow.

This parenting tip come from the book Parenting is Heart Work by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Christmas Program this Sunday BOTH SERVICES!

2011-12-16T12:50:00.000-08:00

Don't miss our Kids Christmas program this Sunday morning! This year we're doing a smaller kids musical, but there will be a couple of puppet skits and some adult ensemble numbers as well. The overall program should be a delight to parents and friends and the message is always wonderful at this time of year. So join us at 8:30am or 10:30am!

Winter/Snow Theme Night at Awana clubs tomorrow night!

2011-12-13T15:03:00.000-08:00

Don't forget that tomorrow night at Awana clubs, clubbers get extra points for wearing winter/snow patterned clothes and other cold looking stuff (not winter coats) as pictured above. And bring a friend! Remember that visitors are always worth BIG points and we can never get enough of them! See you tomorrow at 6:30pm!

Special Lesson Follow-up: Why Do We Call it Christmas?

2011-12-12T14:51:00.000-08:00

This last Sunday, we showed the video of Buck Denver and co. asking "Why Do We Call It Christmas? The kids seemed to get a lot out of this entertaining video which answered a lot of historical questions about the origins of Christmas and certain holiday traditions. So I thought it would be helpful to point parents in the direction of the website where your kids can find related activities and follow up materials. In fact we had a little review question contest for a set of "Chester Whigget's popsicle-stick puppets." If your child didn't win and were disappointed, you can surprise them by printing up a set for them at home by visiting the official website: http://whatsinthebible.com/christmas/activities-worksheets/

Check it out with them. You may learn a thing or two yourself about Christmas that you didn't know. I did.

Caring for Others

2011-12-12T14:47:00.000-08:00

One of the great ways to help children think of giving instead of just getting at Christmas is to reach out to others you don't even know. This one activity can do a tremendous amount to help kids focus on others, not just themselves. Here are some ideas:

Pray for missionaries in other parts of the world. Create a care package for a family and mail it off in time to arrive by Christmas Day.

Get involved in your church's gift-giving program. Most churches provide ways to give tangible gifts to those in need. Ask around your community for organizations that are providing gifts for others.

Take some homemade food and crafts to a local rest home or senior citizen center. Sing songs and greet people. Tell them Merry Christmas. Before you go and when you're finished, talk to your kids about the people you are visiting. Sometimes caring for people can be a challenge and a blessing. Discussions help children understand it all in practical terms.

Make sure that children understand that Christmas is a time when we can share the love of Jesus with others. After all, that's what God did for us.

from biblicalparenting.org

Special C.W. Playhouse Lesson this Sunday

2011-12-08T12:23:00.000-08:00

This Sunday we will be having a special Christmas lesson in the C.W. Playhouse as half of our kids will be rehearsing for the Christmas musical. So after we have some praise and worship and opening fun, we'll be watching a special DVD from What's in the Bible with Buck Denver? In this new DVD from Phil Vischer's Jellyfish Labs, Buck Denver asks... Why Do We Call It Christmas? This DVD explores and answers questions about the historical development of Christmas as a holiday, where some of the symbols of Christmas come from, and how Santa Claus got mixed up in a holiday that is supposed to celebrate the birth of Jesus, all while having a lot of fun through songs, story, and memorable characters. Your kids are sure to learn a thing or two about Christmas and its place in history, and have many of their misconceptions corrected so don't miss this Sunday morning kids service!

The Real Meaning of Christmas

2011-12-08T12:18:00.000-08:00

With so much advertising and emphasis on presents, programs, and parties, take some time to teach your children about the real meaning of Christmas. It's so easy to get distracted by the celebration that one discussion or Christmas program isn't enough to help your children catch the meaning and significance of what Christmas is really all about. Here are some suggestions.

Have a daily or weekly reminder of the Christmas story. Use an advent calendar or read through the Christmas story in the next few weeks.

Tell children what the first Christmas was really like. Did you know that a manger is a cow's eating dish? How far is it from Nazareth to Bethlehem anyway? That would be like walking all the way from our home to _____. What was an Inn like? What were the shepherds doing out with the sheep at night? Did you know that the Bible doesn't say that there were three wise men? Maybe there were ten. Help children think about the story differently than they have before.

Write to a missionary family and find out how they are celebrating Christmas. Talk to your children about how cultures have different traditions but the real meaning of Christmas is the same.

And talk about God's gift of salvation. Why did God start Christmas in the first place? How does his gift change who we are? Keep in mind that this may be time that your child dedicates himself or herself to the Lord in a new and special way.

Christmas is a special time where memories are created that last a lifetime. Take some time to plan your Christmas season carefully to make sure the things you do and say have lasting value.

from: biblicalparenting.org

20 Family-Friendly Holiday Ideas

2011-12-01T12:44:00.000-08:00

It's Family Week in December and to give us all some encouragement to use our Family Week the way it was intended, here is an article from Group Publishing on ways to share the holidays with other families (and your own too.) Read it through and have a family discussion about some ways you could put a couple into practice this year... THIS WEEK!! - PK

'Tis the season to be jolly-and busy! Families have to cook a turkey for the Thanksgiving potluck, shop, cook, clean for company, get their kids to choir rehearsal, attend the Advent program, wrap gifts, go caroling with their Bible study group, and drop the kids off for their Christmas party...

Wouldn't it be nice this holiday season to clear the church calendar and help families focus on what's really important about this season of the year? (Okay, I agree, one or two things are important to keep!)

Encourage families to set aside a Family Night each week. Perhaps they'll stay in for the evening, join with another family for fun activities, or serve another family. Share these ideas with families to help them plan for more than pizza and a movie.

JUST OUR FAMILY

Look at a photo album of family memories. Or watch clips from homemade family videos. Begin conversations with "Remember when..." Tape-record a good memory and send it to the person who was part of it.
Buy a new game as a family gift for Christmas. Open it early and play it together.
Work on a jigsaw puzzle. Play Christmas carols in the background.
Each family night, read aloud a few chapters from A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens until it's finished.
Have each family member choose a Christmas carol, read one verse, and tell why it has special meaning.
Make special cards for grandparents. Together, write a message on each card.
Have each family member think of something helpful to do for another family member. Write the idea on a piece of paper, sign it, and put it in a box. During the next seven days, do the helpful thing and present the box to the right recipient. Repeat this each week.
Go for a walk together. Look for the brightest star, the largest pine cone, the most interesting house decorations, and so on.
Help each other memorize a Christmas verse, a passage, or a psalm.
Go through the alphabet naming gifts from God. The first person begins, "God gave our family an apple tree." The next person says, "God gave our family an apple tree and a basketball goal." Keep adding items. See how far your family can go through the alphabet and remember the gifts named.

FAMILY FRIENDS

Invite a family that's different from your own to dinner. It may be a single person, a single-parent family, or a family who has a child with special needs.
Decorate Christmas cookies with another family. Use a roll of prepared sugar-cookie dough or make your own.
Take a Christmas lights tour of your favorite places. Combine with other families to use the church bus. Or you could rent a bus if you have enough people. End your tour at someone's house for hot cider and Christmas cookies.
Get with another family and each share one holiday tradition.
Have a simple supper together that symbolizes togetherness in the family of God. It may be vegetable soup or a salad that both families contribute to. Note the individual parts and how they make up the whole. Include a loaf of bread to "break bread" together. Read Acts 2:42-47.

FAMILY TO FAMILY

Make hot chocolate mix, freezer jam, or a simple fruit bread. Give to neighbors or people who live near your church. Write a Christmas message on each item.
Join with other families to sing Christmas carols to elderly people.
Trade child care with another family for an evening or Saturday so you can shop, bake, clean, decorate, or sleep.
Help children shop for gifts for their parents (particularly in a single-parent household). Help children wrap and tag their gifts.
Adopt a needy family and provide gifts and food for their Christmas celebration.

Bobbie Bower is a children's ministry consultant in Kansas.

Don't Forget to Collect Pop-Out $$!

2011-11-29T11:05:00.000-08:00

Did your kids participate in the Pop-Out?

It's time to make all that sacrifice count for something!

Remind your kids to collect the money they earned and bring it to Awana clubs tomorrow night or church on Sunday! Remind them that what they did was for something greater than a can of soda.

We've already had over $150 come in from just a couple families. We should quadruple that easily!

Awana Clubs tomorrow night at 6:30pm!

2011-11-15T08:41:00.000-08:00

Awana clubs are in full swing! Don't miss the fun tomorrow night at 6:30pm!

And keep going on that Pop-Out! Only one more week to go!!

How Do You Define a Change of Heart?

2011-11-15T08:37:00.000-08:00

How Do You Define a Change of Heart?

At the National Center for Biblical Parenting we talk a lot about helping children change their hearts. You may be thinking, "My children don't know how to change their hearts." What does that mean anyway, and what can we expect in any given discipline situation?

When a child has done the wrong thing, it's often helpful to require some alone time with instructions like, "You need to take a break. Come back and we'll talk about this after you change your heart." Children may not understand how it happens but with practice they can learn to change their hearts. A change of heart in children involves four steps:

1. Stop fighting, calm down, and be willing to talk about the problem

2. Acknowledge having done something wrong

3. Be willing to change

4. Commit to doing right

These are all steps that a child can do. Ideally we would also like to see two other steps take place:

5. Feel sorrow for doing wrong

6. Have a desire to do what's right

Now, that may sound like a lot, but children grow into this process slowly and we can help them through the steps. If your son has been disrespectful in the way he spoke to you, first he needs to stop and settle down and be willing to work on the problem. Then secondly, he needs to acknowledge that he was wrong. Thirdly, he needs to be willing to respond differently next time. And lastly, he needs to commit to trying to do better.

Sometimes children may only settle down (Step #1) in the "break." Then they are ready to process the other steps with the parent. Other times, children may be able to work through all four steps and then just report back to the parent. The only prerequisite for coming back from a break is that a child be willing to work on changing the heart.

Your child may be ready to change without knowing what the right thing is to do next time. Remember, we're looking for heart level changes. Once your child has had a change of heart, then you can help your child learn what was wrong and what he or she can do differently next time.

Remember, "Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7) Teaching children to change their hearts is a valuable lesson that they will benefit from for the rest of their lives.

This tip comes from the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Army Regulation #8: Don't steal, cheat, or ever be late.

2011-11-10T12:10:00.000-08:00

This Sunday Rowdy Raccoon and Co. (which includes Pastor Kevin & his family) bring to the C.W. Playhouse, the 8th Commandment from Moses, Thou Shalt Not Steal! Don't let your kids miss this important lesson about integrity. We'll be dealing not only with taking property, but also stealing ideas, time, test answers etc. This is probably the most practical and easiest commandment for kids to understand in their own experiences. We'll have a fun game, see a Reddy Recruit skit, participate in a Bible account, and even celebrate some birthdays this week as well!

Look for Positive Qualities Misused

2011-11-10T12:03:00.000-08:00

All children have good character qualities that, when taken to the extreme, have a negative side. One child may be quite organized, but if not careful, may become inflexible in a less structured situation. It's like the saying, "your strength can be your greatest weakness."

One mom told about her son who had a genuine sensitivity to others' needs. He was compassionate and cared for others and often felt things deeply. "I remember one time when he was younger, he began to cry when he saw an ambulance speeding down the road because he knew that someone was hurt inside. He's very caring. Unfortunately, sometimes this sensitivity can cause him to become moody or overly emotional, pouting or crying over the least little problem." So the positive quality is sensitivity but it can have a negative side of being moody or being prone to emotional outbursts.

Another mom saw that her son had the ability to work hard at a task without being distracted. "He focuses intensely, with real determination to succeed." This quality of being persistent can be a real asset, but sometimes it would show itself as stubbornness.

As you look at your children's weaknesses, look for a positive character quality they may be misusing. Look for ways to balance it with other character qualities. Give praise for the positive quality and encourage practical ways to bring balance. Envision a positive future for your child based on those qualities. Encourage small steps of adjustment to bring them in line.

Focusing on character is one of the ways to touch a child's heart and bring about lasting change.

This tip comes from the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

FAMILY WEEK CANCELLED THIS MONTH!

2011-10-31T13:05:00.000-07:00

Because of our Missions Convention this week, we are having a special family Missions Service this Wednesday night instead of Awana. We invite everyone to join us for this special world-missions focus. Renae Pilsing will be our guest speaker. Renae is a missionary to some sensitive regions in India and flows in the gifts of the Spirit, including healing. She was also a children's pastor here in the Wisconsin/Northern-Michigan District for years before going overseas so she's used to talking to kids and teaching at a level they understand.

Next Sunday there will also be no Kids church as we have a single Missions service for Family Week. Our kids will be with us as we worship and pray about how God is calling us to support missions in the coming year.

See you Wednesday and next weekend as we turn our attention outward to the World!

And don't forget to help your kids get started on their Soda-Pop Out with sponsors and no soda!

POP-OUT BGMC Fundraiser begins Nov. 1st! Get 5 sponsors for a can of Soda at Thanksgiving!

2011-10-27T13:59:00.001-07:00

Wednesday night at Awana we handed out Pop-Out sponsor forms and kids made a commitment to fast soda (or other junk foods) from November 1st to Thanksgiving. We'll be doing this same thing this Sunday morning with any kids that weren't here on Wednesday. We encourage you to help your kids get some sponsors to give them a dime a nickel or dime a day for the 21 days that they sacrifice. This is another fundraiser for BGMC to help us toward our goal of $3,000 this year. We're only at about $2,000 so we've got a considerable distance to go and only 2 months left to raise it. This is our last push so we hope everyone will participate and see that gap shrink.

To receive the can of soda on Nov. 23rd, kids have to show us their sponsor sheet with at least 5 names on it (turning in money with it is a bonus, but we'll give them more time after that to collect and that won't stop them from getting their soda can with their name on it).

And remind your kids that this is ultimately for the kingdom of God, not for a cheap can of soda. We want our kids to understand that we give and sacrifice for God's glory and for people to hear the truth unto salvation, right? Amen!

See you Sunday as we look at Commandment #7: Do not commit adultery! (We'll be focusing on loyalty and keeping promises on an age-appropriate level for this one.)

Acknowledging Feelings

2011-10-27T13:56:00.000-07:00

Steps to help you communicate understanding to your child to help her navigate negative feelings.

by Veola Vasquez

The key to helping your child feel understood is to acknowledge his feelings. Follow these steps to get more in tune with your child:

Label the feeling: For younger children, the simpler label you offer the better. Use words like mad, happy, sad and scared. For older children, more specific words help them to pinpoint the exact emotion: disappointed, worried and embarrassed.
State the reason for the feeling. Make your best guess as to why your child feels as he does. For example, say, "It looks like you're mad because Mom said you can't have dessert today."
Don't judge your child. Your child needs to know that it is okay to express emotion. However, at times you may need to teach your child how to express his feelings in ways that are healthy and not hurtful to others.

Do's and Don'ts

Do's:

Support your child. Give physical support (hugs, kisses) and verbal support by acknowledging your child's feelings.
Help your child understand why she is upset. Help her to connect feelings with experiences. Ask open-ended questions about what caused the anger, sadness, fear, etc.
Give your child space. She may need to be taken out of the upsetting situation briefly to find a way to calm down.
Encourage your child to use words to express her feelings. These should be words used to describe what your child feels rather than words used to hurt others.
Teach your child empathy. When your child is angry or sad, remind her that others often feel the same way. Help her think of ways she might help someone if they were feeling the same emotion. She will develop empathy for others and may find ways to help herself in the process.

Don'ts:

Don't try to fix it all. Allow your child to find ways to problem-solve and calm herself. She may need time to figure out the best way to do so.
Don't bribe your child to get her to stop feeling upset. You don't want to short-circuit your child's experience. She needs to learn how to manage her feelings over the long term.
Don't distract your child from her feelings. By acting as if nothing has happened or avoiding negative feelings, we prevent children from learning how to deal with them properly.
Don't punish your child. Scolding a child for experiencing negative feelings will not only make her feel worse but it will discourage her from having those feelings — or being open about them. Instead of discouraging the experience of these emotions, it is crucial to encourage the proper expression of them.
Don't allow your child to hurt others with their negative feelings. Children can say insulting things and, at times, physically hurt others when upset. Teach your child that it is never okay to harm others.

From Focusonthefamily.com

Army Regulation #6: Murder Starts with Anger I Refuse to Fix!

2011-10-24T12:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, the CW Playhouse focused on Commandment #6: You shall not murder in a lesson called DROP YOUR WEAPONS! Reddy Recruit illustrated the point in her usual clueless manner and Dr. Quirky made a surprise visit with a failed experiment that got him pretty hot under the collar and poor Blinky the penguin paid the price, illustrating how much anger hurts. We had an excellent altar response as we dealt with the anger and unforgiveness that leads to murder when its left for years.

As always, we encourage you to talk to your kids about the week's lesson and reinforce it with them. See if they can tell you what they learned, go over the take-home activity sheet they were given. It is always our desire to partner with parents by providing resources and opportunities, not take the place of parents. And if you have questions, call the office and talk to Pastor Kevin. We're here for you!

The Blessing - All Pro Dads Blog post

2011-10-24T12:30:00.000-07:00

Validating our children is so important. A wonderful way to do this is giving them a blessing ceremony. It’s almost like a coming of age or a right of passage celebration. Recently, a friend of mine held a blessing ceremony for his son…

Here’s some more helpful information:

Introduction

For tens of thousands of years, in many countries and cultures throughout the world, rites of passage have been an important part of human culture. A rite of passage is a ritual or ceremony that marks a change in a person’s social status. There are ceremonies in many cultures that memorialize the birth of a child, puberty, graduation, engagement, marriage, death, and other stages of life. In our western culture, while we still celebrate marriage through a wedding ceremony and observe death through a funeral, we lack a generally accepted rite of passage from childhood into adulthood. This rite of passage that occurs around the time of puberty is sometimes called a “blessing.”

What is a blessing?

The Hebrew word for “to bless” is baruch. Baruch means “a good word.” When we bless our child, we are placing our “seal of approval” upon them and giving them power to prosper in many areas of life, including in marriage, with children, in finances, health and career.

Why do children need the blessing of their parents?

A ceremonial blessing is an act of the parents recognizing the passage of a son or daughter emotionally and spiritually into manhood or womanhood. It helps to establish their identity and purpose as an adult.

Establishing identity answers the question, “Who am I?”

Establishing purpose answers the question, “What am I here for?” Additionally, when we release our children into this new season in life, we are also releasing them to take on more responsibility and decision-making. There is something inside every child that makes him crave for a blessing from his parents. And without that blessing, many people spend a lifetime searching for identity and purpose in life. They are always trying to prove themselves worthy to their mom or dad. They are constantly seeking attention, affirmation, and acceptance–in all of the wrong places. They are often striving to prove their manhood or womanhood to themselves and to others through their sexual encounters, the way they dress, their work, the money they make, or by attempting daring feats.

Is it right to bless a rebellious, misbehaving child?

Yes. We need to separate identity and behavior. Remember, when we bless a child, we are giving them power to prosper in life, not condoning rebellion and disobedience. We are blessing them for who they are–a child of God created with infinite value, dignity and worth–not for what they do.

When does the parental blessing occur? It should probably occur sometime between the ages of 12 and 15, depending on the emotional maturity of the child. One sign will be when the child starts to take an interest in the opposite sex and begins to lose an interest in childish things. Another clear sign is when a child reaches puberty.

How does a parent bless his child?

Weddings. Graduations. Award banquets. We remember those occasions, in part, because they were sealed by a ceremony and a celebration. Ceremonies often drive a stake in the ground memorializing a season or time in one’s life. Memorable ceremonies do three things:

1. Ascribe Value. They say to the person being honored, “You are important.” “This occasion is important.”

2. Employ Symbols. A ring, a pen, a necklace, a plaque, a certificate all provide recognition of the significance of an event.

3. Launch a New Season in Life. They say, in essence, “from this day forward, things are going to be different.” And they do it with celebration.

What should be the format of the ceremony?

The ceremony for the blessing can come in all shapes and sizes. It can be conducted in a home, church or even a private room in a restaurant. Invite family members, pastor, and friends you wish to come. Here is an example that you can use to create your own ceremony for your child.

The Blessing of [child's full name]

Welcome and invocation by the mother, father, or minister.
Introduction by mother or father. What is a blessing and what is it for?
Mother prays for her child.
Father (grandfather, Uncle, mentor) blesses the child [See Sample Blessing].
Father presents the ring or necklace to the child as a symbol of the blessing.
Other family members and friends present speak about the child.
Celebration feast!

dffdfad

What should a blessing say? You can say anything you’d like that imparts a “good word” to your child. Here is just one sample. The Blessing of [child's full name] [Child's name], you are my [daughter, son], whom I love; with you I am well pleased. You are no longer a little [girl, boy] You are now a [woman, man]. You are well equipped with everything you need to fulfill your destiny as a [woman, man] of God. Before the foundation of the earth, God Almighty planned for your life and planned for you to be a [woman, man]. Psalm 139 says that He created your inmost being. He knit you together in your mother’s womb. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. All the days ordained for you were written by God even before you were born. There is nothing that you will ever need to do to become a [woman, man] because God has made you one. Tonight, we are simply recognizing publicly what God has done in you. [Child's name], [Here, name all of the wonderful attributes and character traits of your child. For example, for your daughter you might say something like, "God has made you intelligent--you have a strong mind. God has made you beautiful. I've also noticed since the time you were a little girl that our Lord has given you a great ability to understand right and wrong, good and evil. You are able to quickly read and understand people. You get along with everyone and are well-respected and well thought of by others, young and old alike. You are a leader and have used your leadership skills to make wise decisions concerning your friends and in many other areas of your life." I am beyond joyful that God has given you to our family as a gift. You are a wonderful [daughter, son]. I love you and bless you with the promises of God. You are His and have been set apart from the world for his Holy purposes. I bless you with God’s everlasting love, wisdom, peace, and joy. I bless you with sexual purity, marital fidelity, and many children of your own. May God continue to keep His hand of favor and prosper you in all that you do, and may you serve our Lord Jesus Christ all the days of your life. Amen. [Present ring, necklace or other symbol of the blessing.] [Start celebration and feast!]

CODE OF HONOR: Army Regulation #5

2011-10-13T11:32:00.000-07:00

This Sunday morning, the troops will be learning Army Regulation (Commandment) #5. Pastor Kevin and team will be teaching the meaning of the word Honor as it applies to parents and authorities. We've got skits and activities planned for this exciting lesson, as well as visits from your kids' favorite crazy characters, so don't let them miss this week!

Teach Children How to Listen

2011-10-13T11:30:00.000-07:00

A very important skill that children will need as adults is the ability to listen. Listening isn't easy. Most people would rather talk. Children interrupt, yell, and talk over each other, often resulting in misunderstanding. Teaching children how to listen can be a way to help them become less selfish.

One mom told how she taught her children to listen. "I use this technique whenever my boys are in conflict over a toy. I sit them down with the toy on the table and say, 'You can play with the toy as soon as you both agree on a plan.' I encourage them each to share an idea and listen to the other's idea.

I teach them about compromise, working together, and sharing, but I let them work it out. Sometimes they'll both be stubborn and I'll have them stay there until they can agree on a plan. I coach them along when they need it. They must always report back to me before continuing to play, providing an opportunity for me to affirm unselfishness and cooperation."

It can be fun to teach a five-year-old how to persuade a two-year-old, or help two eight-year-olds negotiate a solution. Conflict is turned into cooperation through listening.

I (Scott) like to joke with children, "Do you know why God made lips for your mouth but not for your ears?" or, "Why do you think God gave you one mouth and two ears? It's because God wants you to quiet your mouth sometimes, so you can listen."

James 1:19 gives children very practical advice. "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." As a parent, you have many opportunities to teach this valuable skill.

This tip comes from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

AWANA CLUBS RESUME TONIGHT!

2011-10-12T13:40:00.000-07:00

The long and grueling Family Week is over and it's back to Awana with all of it's excitement and incredible fun learning! The fun begins at 6:30pm! We look forward to seeing your clubbers there fully uniformed with handbooks and Bibles in hand and hopefully a friend in tow! We've already experienced record numbers of kids this year and are burgeoning at the seems in our classrooms, but that's AWESOME!! So keep 'em coming and let's kick off the month of October with extra excitement tonight!

An Indirect Approach to Sibling Conflict

2011-10-12T13:27:00.000-07:00

One great way to challenge the sibling conflict problems in a household is to play games with your children. Games are miniature scenarios about real life. Whether you're playing a board game, a card game, or some kind of communication or role playing game, children have to use relational skills.

Playing games can teach children how to win, how to lose, how to show mercy, and how to talk humbly. As you play games with your children, model honor. Have fun and enjoy the game but avoid put downs, bragging, boasting, hurtful revenge, and meanness. That seems to be hard even for some parents these days.

Teach children how to win without being hurtful, how to lose without complaining, how to make a good move with humility, and show honor whether you're winning or losing. Kids need to see these things modeled in games so they can learn how to handle similar situations in life.

Choose your comments wisely as you correct or confront others who may not handle themselves well. You may let some things go, but your comments are important and children learn from the things you say.

You may see selfishness and bad attitudes demonstrate themselves. Look for loving ways to correct while still enjoying the game. Play games regularly and continue to look for ways to communicate honor and challenge dishonoring behavior and words. You'll be surprised at how much you can teach without your children even realizing they're in a classroom.

This tip comes from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

October Family Week Begins!

2011-09-29T12:07:00.000-07:00

It's Family Week and this Sunday we have a special little something planned with our nursery kids so don't skip church but come on out and worship the Lord with your church family and fellowship together on the Lord's Day!

And next week, don't forget to get together with another family in the church since there's no mid-week services on Wednesday. If you haven't noticed yet, there've been a lot of new families coming to Prayer House and they need to meet people and be welcomed in, so use this opportunity to give them a call and bless them next week.

Awana clubs tonight at 6:30pm! Have you invited a friend?

2011-09-28T14:22:00.000-07:00

Final club night before Family Week! Don't miss out tonight at 6:30pm or you'll have to wait TWO more weeks before the next one!

How to C.H.A.R.M. Your Children

2011-09-28T14:15:00.000-07:00

An old Irish saying defines charm as the ability to get someone to say “Yes” before you even ask the question. Your presence invokes such a warm feeling from someone else that they’ll gladly do what they can to please you. So how is your fatherhood C.H.A.R.M.? Here’s how to exponentially increase your charm with your children:

C — Converse. Talk regularly with your kids on topics they’re interested in.

H — Have fun. Do activities with your children that evoke a lot of laughter.

A — Ask. Ask open-ended questions not just about their day, but what they think about culture, politics, education etc. Don’t judge. Just listen.

R — Read. Read books/magazines/websites together with them and talk about the contents.

M — Make memories. Keep that digital camera and video recorder handy to capture those golden moments in years to come.

- All Pro Dads

The Lord's Army: Commandment #3 This Sunday!

2011-09-22T08:13:00.000-07:00

Have your kids joined the Army, yet? If not, this is the week to enlist!

This Sunday morning we're focusing on Names and giving out dog tags and ranks to each and every little soldier who signs up! So don't let yours miss the fun during second service this Sunday morning at 10:30am! We'll see another skit with Reddy Recruit, the bumbling army private and worship the Lord's glorious name with lots of puppet friends and cool object lessons!

Check out some pictures from last week!

Let Your Kids Fail - By Chip Ingram

2011-09-22T08:06:00.000-07:00

Using consequences to foster responsibility, confidence and success

My son had an ambitious plan. He would drop out of college and focus on his music. All his life, I had urged him to discover what he was created to do and pursue what God had laid on his heart. I just didn't think it would be this — at least not if it meant skipping college. But music was his passion. College wasn't. He had made up his mind.

At first, I didn't know how to respond. I believe kids should be allowed to experience the consequences of their decisions, but the stakes get higher as they get older. The school of hard knocks has an increasingly difficult curriculum. But since its lessons are thorough, I told my son that if he wanted this bad enough to try to make it on his own — without expecting our financial support — he had my blessing.

After about six months, he realized how hard it is to earn a living with a band, and he came to another decision. He would still continue to pursue his dream, but he would also develop a backup plan — which included re-enrolling in college. He held on to his vision but balanced it with realism.

I probably could have forced that decision on my son, but that wouldn't have changed his heart. He would have continued to restlessly look forward to the day he could get out from under his dad's plan for his life. Instead, he got a life-altering perspective on the realities of working for a goal.

The decision to finish school was his. And this time, he was motivated to do well at college.

The importance of failure

Letting children face the consequences of their choices shouldn't begin with something as significant as a career decision. It needs to start much earlier. When our four children were young, my wife and I often had to remind ourselves not to obey our natural impulse to fix their problems.

Learning cause and effect through success and failure is part of a necessary maturing process. Intervening can interrupt that process. Kids can't become responsible adults without failing sometimes.

One way we used failure to teach our kids responsibility was by requiring them to set their own alarm clock and get up when it rang. We were tired of prying them out of bed each morning and making sure they ate breakfast, got dressed and caught the bus. And we were tired of driving them to school when they missed the bus. At a certain age (about 11 or 12 in our house) kids should be able to handle those responsibilities. So we implemented a rule: Whoever overslept and missed breakfast or the bus would suffer the consequences — hunger until lunchtime, detention after school, makeup assignments.

Yet we had a strong urge to intervene — no parent enjoys seeing his children get into messes — but we resisted. It didn't take long for our kids to learn to discipline themselves each morning. The short-term pain of their bad decisions was much easier on them than the long-term power struggle many families go through. We had no more nagging or heated arguments. Just consequences.

Learning to struggle

We do our children a disservice when we cover for them or alleviate the consequences of their choices. Parents who write a note to the teacher explaining why their child once again failed to finish his homework set up the child for a lifetime of seeking special treatment — and frustration when it isn't given. Parents who push for their child to get the lead role in a play — even when he doesn't deserve it — deny the child the opportunities for growth that come with failure and disappointment.

Kids never learn how to cope with life when parents do all the coping for them. They enter adulthood without the confidence that they'll be able to handle whatever comes their way.

To make it in this world, kids need to know how to struggle. They need to learn how to persevere for a hard-fought victory and how to handle disappointment when victory doesn't come. They need to understand that they reap what they sow and that life isn't always fair.

In order to learn these things, they'll have to experience a lot of bumps and bruises. Some will be self-inflicted, and others will be imposed on them by a sinful world. But all of their wounds can become a lifelong lesson in how to stand strong.

Your kids will have to learn these hard lessons sooner or later, and sooner is better. Once they become adults, the world won't clean up after their mistakes, and it won't nurse their wounds when they are treated unfairly. If they've learned wisdom and responsibility early, they'll reap the benefits for a lifetime.

The role of parents

A parent's job is not to make sure a child has a smooth or comfortable life. Our role is to put safeguards around them when they're young to keep them from ultimate harm; to gradually widen those safeguards as they mature; and to help them to grow into the person God wants them to be.

The son who once dropped out of college eventually earned his degree. Later, as a newly married man, he told me he was moving to Nashville, Tenn., to pursue the dream God had put on his heart. I wasn't thrilled with his decision, but I gave him my blessing anyway.

Yes, he might fail again, but I knew it wouldn't happen because he was naive. From his earlier experience, he knew what it would take to succeed. And the second time he actually did. He's now a successful songwriter — and standing strong in the trials of life.

Awana Launch Tonight!

2011-09-14T11:26:00.000-07:00

A New Club year launches tonight!! 6:30pm is the start time, but if you've not yet registered your kids (and maybe even if you have) you'll want to come a few minutes early and take care of business. Being the first day with many who haven't done so yet, it is likely to create a bottleneck at the check-in table if you come at the last minute or even late.

We're very excited to be launching another new club this year! We now have CUBBIES for pre-K children 3yrs old and up! Shannon Siver will be leading this exuberant new club with the help of Tammy Caddy and Sarah Racewicz and it will be so fun to see our little ones running the halls wearing their little blue vests!

The Sparkies (K-2nd) club is under new leadership this year as well! We welcome Tammy Short this year, who is ecstatic to be teaching this age-group and has lots of new ideas. Joining her will be Phil and Gwen Alderks, Kim Hall, Lou Ann Auch, and Mark Short.

Even our T&T club leadership has grown! Tammie Oscar returns as director with Vicki Pellicori and Sue Lueck to run the largest club which is why we're happy to have even more help this year! Doubling the T&T team this year, we have Lisa Reyes, John Cronce, and Betty Palmer!

And the early-bird order has arrived so we are ready and rearing to go!

See you tonight!

The Benefits of Eating Together as a Family

2011-09-14T11:15:00.000-07:00

Reason #2: Model Manners (and more)
Family mealtime is the perfect opportunity to display appropriate table manners, meal etiquette, and social skills. Keep the mood light, relaxed, and loving. Try not to instruct or criticize—lead by example.

Reason # 3: Expand Their World…One Food at a Time
Encourage your children to try new foods, without forcing, coercing, or bribing. Introduce a new food along with some of the stand-by favorites. Remember that it can take 8-10 exposures to a new food before it is accepted, so be patient. Trying a new food is like starting a new hobby. It expands your child’s knowledge, experience, and skill.

Include foods from other cultures and countries.
Select a new vegetable from a local farmer’s market.
Have your child select a new recipe from a cookbook, web site, newspaper, or magazine.

Reason #5: Become Self-Sufficient
Children today are missing out on the importance of knowing how to plan and prepare meals. Basic cooking, baking, and food preparation are necessities for being self-sufficient. Involve your family in menu planning, grocery shopping, and food preparation. Preschoolers can tear lettuce, cut bananas, and set the table. Older children can pour milk, peel vegetables, and mix batter. Teenagers can dice, chop, bake, and grill. Working as a team puts the meal on the table faster, as well as makes everyone more responsible and accepting of the outcome. Improved eating habits come with "ownership" of a meal.

Reason #6: Prevent Destructive Behaviors

Research shows that frequent family dinners (five or more a week), are associated with lower rates of smoking, drinking, and illegal drug use in pre-teens and teenagers when compared to families that eat together two or fewer times per week. Even as older children’s schedules get more complicated, it is important to make an effort to eat meals together. Scheduling is a must.

Reason #7: Improve Grades
Children do better in school when they eat more meals with their parents and family. Teenagers who eat dinner four or more times per week with their families have higher academic performance compared with teenagers who eat with their families two or fewer times per week.

Reason # 8: Save Money
Meals purchased away from home cost two to four times more than meals prepared at home. At present time the restaurant industry’s share of the total food dollar is more than 46%. Due to scheduling, commitments, and activities, families eat out several times each week.

It is time to bring the "family" back to the dinner table. Sharing dinner together gives everyone a sense of identity. It can help ease day-to-day conflicts, as well as establish traditions and memories that can last a lifetime.

Source: sparkpeople.com

The Lord's Army: Lessons from the Ten Commandments Begins Sunday!

2011-09-07T19:33:00.000-07:00

This Sunday, we begin the new C.W. Playhouse Kids Church series, The Lord's Army! From now until Christmas, kids will be learning the 10 Commandments through a new military theme in preparation for the next important event in our chronological journey through the Bible: Conquering the Promised Land! But of course, before the conquest and the promise, the Israelites have to learn some important lessons that will keep them wandering in the desert for 40 year, not the least of which are the BIG TEN! So don't let your kids miss out on this incredibly important series that will teach them the basics of God's moral law as given to Moses! The fun starts this week at 10:30am!

Children Outgrow Rule but Not Values

2011-09-07T19:31:00.000-07:00

As children get older, parents gradually release control of decision-making and allow their kids greater freedom to make choices for themselves. Too much freedom too early can be disastrous but too much control and then instant freedom can be dangerous as well.

The key to making good decisions has a lot to do with values, but children don't get to hear about values as often. Children hear rules. If, when your kids are growing up, you talk about the values behind the rules then when they have the freedom to make their own decisions, they'll be able to do so with wisdom.

Children outgrow rules, but they don't outgrow values. When kids are young you may not allow them to go down the street without an adult. When they get a little older they'll have to check in and be home at a certain time. Those are rules but they come out of very important values of safety and accountability. When a college student is invited to stay out late with her friends, those values from childhood will still ring true, and will help guide her to wise decisions.

Prepare now for your child's future decision-making. What are the values behind the rules you've created? Share those values regularly as opportunities to teach your kids. Your children will carry the values on for the rest of their lives.

This parenting tip comes from the book Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Get Pictures with Kodiak T. Bear the Final Two Weeks of VBS!

2011-08-23T14:00:00.000-07:00

We have come to our final Summer Lesson: God Loves Me! This week and next will be our two most important weeks of the summer as we share the basic gospel message with the kids, including many visitors who may have never heard the good news of Jesus before! So don't grow weary. Make sure you bring your kids and their neighborhood friends for the final two weeks of our VBS Summer Camp!

Tomorrow Haggis McGonnagle will join us for the final time with a little Gospel illusion to illustrate the message and bring a few gasps of wonder to the kids. We'll also have our final craft of the summer. Of course, Kodiak bear will be with us and we will be giving kids opportunity to get their pictures taken with him these last two weeks, so they may want to dress special for the occasion.

See you tomorrow night at Camp Moosefeather Falls!!

Getting Off To School On the Right Foot

2011-08-23T13:35:00.000-07:00

Mornings can be a stressful time for families. As your family prepares for some new routines this school year, here’s a tip to help you get off on the right foot. One of the goals parents have for their children is to teach them to be independent and internally motivated. One single mom told how she addressed this for her children, ages 9, 10, and 11.

“I didn't like what I was seeing in myself. I heard myself nagging and prodding them along, yelling, ‘You're going to be late. You better hurry and brush your hair. Get your shoes on…’ So she gathered the children together one evening to introduce a new plan.

“You three are getting older. Tomorrow begins a new system where you're going to manage yourselves. I've been doing a lot of yelling in the morning and I don't want to do that anymore. So I have a plan. I'm not going to wake you up in the morning. Here is a new alarm clock for each of you. You can decide what time you want to get up and it will wake you.

“I want you to learn to be independent so we're going to have check points each morning. At 7:15 am you need to be down for breakfast, all dressed with shoes on, and your bed made. By 7:50 am you need to have completed your chores and have combed your hair. Those are the checkpoints. This means you have to learn to look at the clock yourself and not wait for me to tell you what time it is.

“To help you be motivated to meet these check points, I have something positive and something negative. Let's start with the positive. First, if you meet your two check points each morning for five mornings then I will allow you to watch a video on the weekend. However, if you miss one check point on a morning you will have to go to bed a half hour earlier that evening, since you must need more sleep in order to get up and get yourself ready.”

They ended the meeting positively as they talked about the benefits of independence and being self-motivated. Mom taught the kids how to set their alarms and they felt empowered and eager to manage themselves the next morning.

The following day Mom was in bed and heard alarms going off and feet shuffling. She wasn't quite ready to get up and began having second thoughts about her great plan. In the end though, it worked. Her children were successful at demonstration independence in the morning by getting ready and Mom didn't have to nag or be harsh. She replaced yelling and nagging with firmness and a clear plan for developing independence in her kids, all in a positive atmosphere of cooperation.
For more practical ideas on parenting with honor, consider the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining and Bad Attitudes in You and Your kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN. For more ideas on developing independence and self-motivation in kids consider the CD series, Everyday Parents CAN Raise Extraordinary Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

2011-08-18T08:59:00.000-07:00

This Sunday we continue the Life of Moses with arguably the greatest miracle of the Exodus story: the Parting of the Red Sea! Your kids will learn how God protects his children even in overwhelming circumstances that seem impossible. In fact, overcoming impossibility is God's specialty!

10:30am this Sunday in the C.W. Playhouse!

The Benefits of Eating Together

2011-08-18T08:53:00.000-07:00

"Come and get it!" It may be dinnertime, but when was the last time your family sat down and enjoyed a mealtogether? With music lessons, ball practice, play rehearsal, and work schedules, it can be tough. Rounding up the troops for an evening meal can be almost impossible! However, research is beginning to show that eating as a family has great benefits for your children and teenagers. Here are 8 more reasons why you should try to sit down together 5-6 times a week, whether for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Reason #1: Communication and Well-Being Conversations during the meal provide opportunities for the family to bond, plan, connect, and learn from one another. It’s a chance to share information and news of the day, as well as give extra attention to your children and teens. Family mealsfoster warmth, security and love, as well as feelings of belonging. It can be a unifying experience for all. Reason #2: Model Manners (and more) Family mealtime is the perfect opportunity to display appropriate table manners, meal etiquette, and social skills. Keep the mood light, relaxed, and loving. Try not to instruct or criticize—lead by example. Reason # 3: Expand Their World…One Food at a Time Encourage your children to try new foods, without forcing, coercing, or bribing. Introduce a new food along with some of the stand-by favorites. Remember that it can take 8-10 exposures to a new food before it is accepted, so be patient. Trying a new food is like starting a new hobby. It expands your child’s knowledge, experience, and skill.

Include foods from other cultures and countries.
Select a new vegetable from a local farmer’s market.
Have your child select a newrecipe from a cookbook, web site, newspaper, magazine or check out the recipes on SparkPeople.

Reason #4: Nourish Meals prepared and eaten at home are usually more nutritious and healthy. They contain more fruits, vegetables, and dairy products along with additional nutrients such as fiber, calcium, vitamins A and C, and folate. Home cooked meals are usually not fried or highly salted, plus soda and sweetened beverage consumption is usually lower at the dinner table. Reason #5: Become Self-Sufficient Children today are missing out on the importance of knowing how to plan and prepare meals. Basic cooking, baking, and food preparation are necessities for being self-sufficient. Involve your family in menu planning, grocery shopping, and food preparation. Preschoolers can tear lettuce, cut bananas, and set the table. Older children can pour milk, peel vegetables, and mix batter. Teenagers can dice, chop, bake, and grill. Working as a team puts the meal on the table faster, as well as makes everyone more responsible and accepting of the outcome. Improved eating habits come with "ownership" of a meal. Reason #6: Prevent Destructive Behaviors

Research shows that frequent family dinners (five or more a week), are associated with lower rates of smoking, drinking, and illegal drug use in pre-teens and teenagers when compared to families that eat together two or fewer times per week. Even as older children’s schedules get more complicated, it is important to make an effort to eat meals together. Scheduling is a must. Reason #7: Improve Grades Children do better in school when they eat more meals with their parents and family. Teenagers who eat dinner four or more times per week with their families have higher academic performance compared with teenagers who eat with their families two or fewer times per week. Reason # 8: Save Money Meals purchased away from home cost two to four times more than meals prepared at home. At present time the restaurant industry’s share of the total food dollar is more than 46%. Due to scheduling, commitments, and activities, families eat out several times each week. It is time to bring the "family" back to the dinner table. Sharing dinner together gives everyone a sense of identity. It can help ease day-to-day conflicts, as well as establish traditions and memories that can last a lifetime.

SOURCE: Sparkpeople.com

WHERE'S KODY? VBS: CAMP RESUMES TONIGHT AT 6:30PM!

2011-08-17T13:01:00.000-07:00

VBS Camp is back! The question is... is Kody the Bear back? He went missing last time and its been two weeks since anyone's seen him. Make sure your kids don't miss out tonight if they want to find out where he's been or if he returns at all. We'll continue with our lesson: You are Special and illustrate the point with snacks, games, and our usual visit from the groundskeeper.

REMEMBER THAT WE DON'T BEGIN TONIGHT UNTIL 6:30PM AND WE'LL FINISH BY 8PM!

See you in a few hours!

Sibling Rivalry

2011-08-17T12:56:00.000-07:00

"Dad, she's in my room getting into my things again!"

"Mom, he won't stop annoying me!"

"Me first! Me first! Me first!"

Sound familiar? If you have more than one child, the answer is probably "yes," because these are the sounds of sibling rivalry or sibling conflict.

While many kids are lucky enough to become the best of friends with their siblings, it's very common for brothers and sisters to fight. (It's also common for them to swing back and forth between adoring and detesting one other!)

Often, sibling rivalry starts even before the second child is born, and continues as the kids grow and compete for everything from toys to attention. As kids reach different stages of development, their evolving needs can significantly affect how they relate to one another.

It can be frustrating and upsetting to watch — and hear — your kids fight with one another. A household that's full of conflict is stressful for everyone. Yet often it's hard to know how to stop the fighting, and or even whether you should get involved at all. But you can take steps to promote peace in your household and help your kids get along.

Why Do My Kids Fight?

Many different things can cause siblings to fight. Most brothers and sisters experience some degree of jealousy or competition, and this can flare into squabbles and bickering. But other factors also might influence how often kids fight and how severe the fighting gets. These include:

Evolving needs. It's natural for kids' changing needs, anxieties, and identities to affect how they relate to one another. For example, toddlers are naturally protective of their toys and belongings, and are learning to assert their will, which they'll do at every turn. So if a baby brother or sister picks up the toddler's toy, the older child may react aggressively. School-age kids often have a strong concept of fairness and equality, so might not understand why siblings of other ages are treated differently or feel like one child gets preferential treatment. Teenagers, on the other hand, are developing a sense of individuality and independence, and might resent helping with household responsibilities, taking care of younger siblings, or even having to spend time together. All of these differences can influence the way kids fight with one another.
Individual temperaments. Your kids' individual temperaments — including mood, disposition, and adaptability — and their unique personalities play a large role in how well they get along. For example, if one child is laid back and another is easily rattled, they may often get into it. Similarly, a child who is especially clingy and drawn to parents for comfort and love might be resented by siblings who see this and want the same amount of attention.
Special needs/sick kids. Sometimes, a child's special needs due to illness or learning/emotional issues may require more parental time. Other kids may pick up on this disparity and act out to get attention or out of fear of what's happening to the other child.
Role models. The way that parents resolve problems and disagreements sets a strong example for kids. So if you and your spouse work through conflicts in a way that's respectful, productive, and not aggressive, you increase the chances that your children will adopt those tactics when they run into problems with one another. If your kids see you routinely shout, slam doors, and loudly argue when you have problems, they're likely to pick up those bad habits themselves.

What Can I Do When the Fighting Starts?

While it may be common for brothers and sisters to fight, it's certainly not pleasant for anyone in the house. And a family can only tolerate a certain amount of conflict. So what should you do when the fighting starts?

Whenever possible, don't get involved. Step in only if there's a danger of physical harm. If you always intervene, you risk creating other problems. The kids may start expecting your help and wait for you to come to the rescue rather than learning to work out the problems on their own. There's also the risk that you — inadvertently — make it appear to one child that another is always being "protected," which could foster even more resentment. By the same token, rescued kids may feel that they can get away with more because they're always being "saved" by a parent.

If you're concerned by the language used or name-calling, it's appropriate to "coach" kids through what they're feeling by using appropriate words. This is different from intervening or stepping in and separating the kids.

Even then, encourage them to resolve the crisis themselves. If you do step in, try to resolve problems with your kids, not for them.

When getting involved, here are some steps to consider:

Separate kids until they're calm. Sometimes it's best just to give them space for a little while and not immediately rehash the conflict. Otherwise, the fight can escalate again. If you want to make this a learning experience, wait until the emotions have died down.
Don't put too much focus on figuring out which child is to blame. It takes two to fight — anyone who is involved is partly responsible.
Next, try to set up a "win-win" situation so that each child gains something. When they both want the same toy, perhaps there's a game they could play together instead.

Remember, as kids cope with disputes, they also learn important skills that will serve them for life — like how to value another person's perspective, how to compromise and negotiate, and how to control aggressive impulses.

Helping Kids Get Along

Simple things you can do every day to prevent fighting include:

Set ground rules for acceptable behavior. Tell the kids that there's no cursing, no name-calling, no yelling, no door slamming. Solicit their input on the rules — as well as the consequences when they break them. This teaches kids that they're responsible for their own actions, regardless of the situation or how provoked they felt, and discourages any attempts to negotiate regarding who was "right" or "wrong."
Don't let kids make you think that everything always has to be "fair" and "equal" — sometimes one kid needs more than the other.
Be proactive in giving your kids one-on-one attention directed to their interests and needs. For example, if one likes to go outdoors, take a walk or go to the park. If another child likes to sit and read, make time for that too.
Make sure kids have their own space and time to do their own thing — to play with toys by themselves, to play with friends without a sibling tagging along, or to enjoy activities without having to share 50-50.
Show and tell your kids that, for you, love is not something that comes with limits.
Let them know that they are safe, important, and needed, and that their needs will be met.
Have fun together as a family. Whether you're watching a movie, throwing a ball, or playing a board game, you're establishing a peaceful way for your kids to spend time together and relate to each other. This can help ease tensions between them and also keeps you involved. Since parental attention is something many kids fight over, fun family activities can help reduce conflict.
If your children frequently squabble over the same things (such as video games or dibs on the TV remote), post a schedule showing which child "owns" that item at what times during the week. (But if they keep fighting about it, take the "prize" away altogether.)
If fights between your school-age children are frequent, hold weekly family meetings in which you repeat the rules about fighting and review past successes in reducing conflicts. Consider establishing a program where the kids earn points toward a fun family-oriented activity when they work together to stop battling.
Recognize when kids just need time apart from each other and the family dynamics. Try arranging separate play dates or activities for each kid occasionally. And when one child is on a play date, you can spend one-on-one time with another.

Keep in mind that sometimes kids fight to get a parent's attention. In that case, consider taking a time-out of your own. When you leave, the incentive for fighting is gone. Also, when your own fuse is getting short, consider handing the reins over to the other parent, whose patience may be greater at that moment.

Getting Professional Help

In a small percentage of families, the conflict between brothers and sisters is so severe that it disrupts daily functioning, or particularly affects kids emotionally or psychologically. In those cases, it's wise to get help from a mental health professional. Seek help for sibling conflict if it:

is so severe that it's leading to marital problems
creates a real danger of physical harm to any family member
is damaging to the self-esteem or psychological well-being of any family member
may be related to another psychiatric disorder, such as depression

If you have questions about your kids' fighting, talk with your doctor, who can help you determine whether your family might benefit from professional help and refer you to local mental health resources.

source: kidshealth.org

NOT FAMILY WEEK YET!!! VBS TOMORROW NIGHT!

2011-08-02T13:22:00.001-07:00

THIS IS NOT FAMILY WEEK! Remember that Family Week always follows the first Sunday of the month so since the first was on a Monday we have a full week in August before we start Family Week. That means that tomorrow night we have VBS again! So don't stay home this week!

REMEMBER THAT WE START AT 6:30 NOW, NOT 6:15!

Tomorrow night we start lesson 4: You Are Special! Haggis McGonagle, the absent-minded camp Moosefeather Falls Trail Guide, will be with us again and there will be crafts again! It will be fun as always! See you then!

Teaching "Why" Helps Children for the Future

2011-08-02T13:11:00.000-07:00

We encourage parents to ask their children a series of questions after every discipline experience. One of those questions is, "Why was that wrong?" Some parents like this question because it appears to be a set-up for a parental lecture. Resist this urge. You may have a desire to lecture but your child may quickly turn you off.

Furthermore some children answer this question by saying, "because you shouldn't do it." Again, this is an opportunity to help children understand some of the deeper issues involved.

Use this question to address heart issues directly. Through dialogue you can point out the bad attitudes like pride, selfishness, anger, or disrespect. Also, you can help children understand the values behind the rules. If you tell your four-year-old son to stay in the back yard and he violates that rule, you can teach him about living within limits. The same value will be taught to him at seventeen years old when he wants to stay out past curfew. By talking about the values, you prepare children to handle a variety of different rules and to translate those rules from one situation to another.

Help your child learn that behavior is only a symptom of something deeper. Parents and children see the behavior but it's important to look at the heart. The Bible is full of principles that will help a child be successful. You may refer to the scriptures or even tell Bible stories that are appropriate. The question, "Why was that wrong?" helps you do significant teaching every day as you work with your kids.

If you'd like to know more about developing a good correction plan for your child, consider joining Biblical Parenting University. Or, learn more about ending discipline times well in our book, Home Improvement, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Since God made everything, He knows how to use everything - naturally or supernaturally!

2011-07-29T18:58:00.000-07:00

This week in the C.W. Playhouse, New Frontiers presents the THE PLAGUES on Egypt as we look at how God not only answers prayer super-naturally, but naturally, using the things of creation to accomplish his good purposes and rescue his people. Join Cookie, the wagon-train chef and the rest of our western round-up as we explore the next exciting chapter of Moses' life.

THIS WEEK IS ALSO BGMC SUNDAY!! There will be donuts for everyone if we bring in $50 or more in BGMC offering so bring those Buddy Barrels and Boxes this Sunday!

VBS Lesson #3 Week 2: God Made You

2011-07-26T13:50:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow night is week two of our 3rd lesson in our VBS: CAMP! Campers will be learning that God Made Us while playing games and eating tasty snacks. Then we'll close out the lesson with campfire songs, Kodiak bear, another lesson-illustrating skit from the Muskrat Cabin Comedy Team, and finally Bryan, the camp groundskeeper will bring a lesson illustration that the kids won't soon forget! The fun ramps up starting at 6:15pm! Don't let your kids miss out!

And remember, the cabin that brings the most offering for BGMC wins candy bars at the end of the night!

SPECIAL NOTICE! Starting next week, VBS time will cut back to normal mid-week service times: 6:30pm to 8pm! Please make a note of it.

5 Ways to be a Good Listener to your Kids

2011-07-26T13:48:00.000-07:00

According to research on listening skills, being a good listener means focusing attention on the message and reviewing the important information. Parents can model good listening behavior for their children and advise them on ways to listen as an active learner, pick out highlights of a conversation, and ask relevant questions. Sometimes it helps to "show" children that an active listener is one who looks the speaker in the eye and is willing to turn the television off to make sure that the listener is not distracted by outside interference.

Be interested and attentive. Children can tell whether they have a parent's interest and attention by the way the parent replies or does not reply. Forget about the telephone and other distractions. Maintain eye contact to show that you really are with the child.
Encourage talking. Some children need an invitation to start talking. Children are more likely to share their ideas and feelings when others think them important.
Listen patiently. People think faster than they speak. Children often take longer than adults to find the right word. Listen as though you have plenty of time.
Hear children out. Avoid cutting children off before they have finished speaking. It is easy to form an opinion or reject children's views before they finish what they have to say. It may be difficult to listen respectfully and not correct misconceptions, but respect their right to have and express their opinions.
Listen to nonverbal messages. Many messages children send are communicated nonverbally by their tone of voice, their facial expressions, their energy level, their posture, or changes in their behavior patterns. You can often tell more from the way a child says something than from what is said. When a child comes in obviously upset, be sure to find a quiet time then or sometime later.

Even when my eyes can't see, I know God wants what's best for me.

2011-07-23T10:57:00.000-07:00

Bricks without straw is the focus of this week's lesson in the C.W. Playhouse: New Frontiers. We'll be looking at the disappointment the Israelites faced when Pharoah made things harder on them after God's deliverer showed up to help them. How often do we face similar disappointment, wondering why things get worse before they get better when we pray or obey God on something? That is the tough subject we'll be addressing this Sunday with the kids as we continue in the life of Moses. Don't let your kids miss out! 10:30am at Prayer House!

When Your Toddler Hits

2011-07-23T10:56:00.000-07:00

Toddlers hit out of frustration, anger, or for mere entertainment. What should a parent do? Sometimes the solution is simply to distract your child with a different activity. But if the problem persists and you feel like discipline is necessary, we recommend that you take consistent, firm action. Keep in mind that a firm approach doesn't require harshness.

Immediately set your child down on the floor, with a firm statement like, "Be gentle" and step back to avoid getting hit again. Don't display anger but be deliberate and firm. Your child needs to learn that hitting doesn't work. She can't stay in your arms or on your lap. If she hits you will remove her from that place immediately.

But that's not the end. The next thing your child does is come to you for a hug. This is the precursor to the Positive Conclusion you will use later. "Are you ready to get up. Come over and give me a hug. Show me what gentle is." Allow the child to give a hug or stroke your arm with her hand in a gentle way. Praise her for her gentleness.

When you set your son down after hitting, he may have a temper tantrum. If you're in a situation that allows, the best thing is to ignore him until he's calmed down and then encourage him to come back for a reuniting time.

Immediate, consistent, temporary separation like this followed by a Positive Conclusion will discourage the hitting and replace it with something else. A careful balance is needed here between a firm approach and a loving relationship.

Children who can't yet talk or communicate well, often get frustrated and act out with violence. Don't just ignore it. While you're teaching communication skills, also teach limits on hitting, biting, pushing, and other forms of physical meanness.

This parenting tip comes from the audio series, Parenting Toddlers. You can listen to Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller teach that series on CD or MP3. Make this summer a growing experience for Mom and Dad.

God Gives Us Purpose. That's Why He Equips Us.

2011-07-14T15:03:00.000-07:00

Cookie, the wacky Wagon Train Cook is back this Sunday at the C.W. Playhouse with the next exciting lesson from the life of Moses, BRUSH FIRE! This week's lesson focuses on the Burning Bush experience and kids will learn that God calls us and equips us. See you Sunday morning at 10:30am for all the fun and more importantly, for an encounter with God!

Be Careful with Triangles

2011-07-14T15:02:00.000-07:00

Triangles in relationships happen often in family life. Conflict between two people can become an invitation for another person to join in. If parents aren't careful, and create triangles inappropriately, people get hurt. But if triangles are used properly, they become great opportunities for healing and learning. Here are some examples to watch out for:

• A child who is unhappy with Dad's discipline may go to Mom and try to get her to overrule a decision.

• A dad may criticize the way Mom is handling a situation.

• A child may go to Dad with a proposal to get around Mom's instructions.

• A teen may get angry with Mom for the way she’s treating his brother.

• One child may tattle on another.

Each of these situations represents an opportunity. Some advice suggests that triangles are always wrong and warn not to get involved. We don't believe that's the answer. Rather we suggest you triangle in as a counselor or coach instead of a critic. When you decide to triangle into a relationship, be careful. You may be right, but being right is not enough. You also need to be wise. Be careful about taking sides and creating more division in the strained relationship. Instead, look for ways to do some teaching and bring about healing.

The key is to focus on the issues of the person who comes to you. When Billy tattles on his brother by saying, "Mom, Sam left the light on again," take time to talk to Billy about how he should handle the situation. Maybe the right thing is for Billy to go turn off the light. Your role in the situation is important because you work with the problem from the perspective of the person who comes to you. Invariably, that person needs help and guidance to know how to respond to the challenge.

If Sarah believes Mom is being unfair, Dad can draw out the conversation with Sarah so she begins to see Mom’s perspective in addition to her own. Healthy dialogue can equip others to solve the conflict or at least see it differently. An empathetic response from a third party can open doors of dialogue.

Triangles are common in relationships, particularly in single parent families and blended families. They are opportunities for people to learn and grow. Identify them and take advantage of them, but be careful not to get sucked into the conflict in unhealthy ways.

This parenting tip is taken from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
In Chapter 5 you’ll find more helpful ways to think about family dynamics.

VBS Lesson #2 Week 2: God is Strong!

2011-07-12T10:44:00.000-07:00

VBS fires up again tomorrow night! Don't forget that it starts at 6:15 for the summer! Tomorrow is our game/snack night and will end with our drama team skit and a visit from the groundskeeper! Your kids won't want to miss the fun! See you tomorrow!

Ugly Ties 2011 Showcase

2011-07-06T10:19:00.000-07:00

1st Place: Anastacia Tisdale ($62.00 for BGMC)

2n Place: Mikey Tisdale

3rd Place: Kiersten Hall

4th Place: Rebekah Robinson

5th Place: Hunter Hall

6th Place: Adrianna Miller

7th Place: Noah Britten

Our Ugly Tie Contest was a great success bringing in almost $250 for missions. We missed getting pictures of a couple of the guys in their ties and we didn't catch all the kids to take pictures with the men before they left, but congrats to all of our participants. Every tie helped bring in something!

Here's a list of all the participants not listed above in alphabetical order:

Mary Britten

Ariana & Callie Hubing

Carrianna Miller

Jackie & Natalie Siver

Thanks, everyone!

A Child's Primary Job

2011-07-06T10:16:00.000-07:00

Here's an interesting dialogue we had with a seven-year-old boy we'll call Jeff. "What would you think of a mailman who picks up trash on all the streets as he goes around the neighborhood?"

"That would be pretty good."

"But what if he didn't get the mail delivered?"

"He'd get fired!"

"That's right. Delivering the mail is his job."

"What would you think about the car mechanic who likes to talk to people and socialize but doesn't get the cars fixed?"

"He'd get in trouble."

"Yes, you're probably right because repairing cars is his job. You know, children have a job to do but sometimes they get distracted and do other things."

"What's a child's job?"

"According to Ephesians 6:1 a child's primary job is to learn to obey."

"Yeah, right."

"You don't seem too excited about that job."

"I'm not. My parents are always telling me what to do."

"Well that's their job. Let me help you understand why God gave you that job. Hidden within obedience are all kinds of principles that will make you successful when you get older. You will learn how to be a better student, employee, or boss by learning how to obey when you're young. You’ll also learn to obey God, and that’s very important."

"Oh yeah, how?"

"Well, some employees can't do a simple task without arguing about it. If they would have learned to obey when younger, they might not have such a problem following directions. Or, some students can't accept an assignment without complaining about it. If they had learned obedience when younger, they might be able to do a hard job without complaining. There's nothing wrong with evaluating instructions or helping parents with alternatives, but there's a lot of benefit to obeying just to learn obedience. God knew that and he hid many character qualities inside of obedience that will help you do well in life."

"That's interesting."

"The next time you're given an instruction, especially one you don't want to do, maybe you ought to think about obeying with a good attitude just because of what it will teach you."

The point of this conversation is that obedience has more benefits than many children realize and that they have opportunities now to prepare themselves for life in future.

This parenting tip comes from the book Home Improvement, the Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Prayer House Pastors/Elders Partner with Buddy Barrel this Sunday!

2011-06-30T12:25:00.000-07:00

(Are they making calls for BGMC pledges?)

The Kids have done their part, creatively decorating ties for our voting pleasure. Now it's time for the Pastors and Elders to proudly display them for the Glory of God and the furtherance of His Kingdom! This Sunday we'll be worshiping together with our kids and Pastor Kevin will be bringing the message with the winning tie around his neck. Pastor Ron will wear the tie that brought in the second most money for BGMC, then Pastor Nick and the other pastors and elders.

It'll be fun, but most importantly, with your help, our kids brought in almost $250 through this fundraiser. Thanks everyone!

Hope you can join us for the fun as we kick off another family week and prepare to celebrate our freedom and independence!

Last Chance to Vote on Ugly Ties Wednesday!!!

2011-06-27T12:12:00.000-07:00

This Wednesday night will be the last chance to vote on Ugly ties and see your favorite one worn by Pastor Kevin in church Sunday. 2nd place will be worn by Pastor Ron and then Pastor Nick, Pastor Brad, Pastor John, Pastor Eddie, Pastor Chad and then Trustees and Elders! So don't miss this last chance to drop a $20 on your favorite. I think I'm gonna have to actually drop some cash in myself so I make sure I don't end up wearing a dirt tie! Yuck! But it's for missions so I'll do what must be done!

Hope you will too!

When Trouble's on a Roll, God's Still in Control!

2011-06-27T12:01:00.000-07:00

As we transitioned from Genesis into Exodus yesterday in the CW Playhouse, we focused on serving Jesus even when life is hard. Like the Israelites who became slaves in Egypt after Joseph died, we have to hold on to the promises of God and know that He is still in control. Ask your kids what the Big Idea was for yesterday's lesson. They should tell you "When trouble's on a roll, God's still in Control." Cookie, the wagon train cook, also pointed out that God can take bad situations and turn them into blessings. And finally we talked about spiritual warfare and being soldiers who fight for others who are in bondage like Moses confronted Pharoah for his people.

Joseph said it best in the last chapter of Genesis when he assured his brothers... "You intended to harm me but God intended it for good... the saving of many lives." Genesis 50:20

Talk to your kids about what they learned in kids church this week. See if they can quote the verse above to you and tell you the Big Idea. Then discuss the subject further as you apply it to their life and maybe the situation your own family faces. That's how to make the seeds sown by your children's pastor grow all week long.

10 Battles for your Family you must Fight and Win

2011-06-27T11:58:00.000-07:00

The people of ancient Galatia (modern-day Turkey) lived on a plain that was virtually indefensible, but they managed to survive there for nearly 600 years. How did they do it? Well, when an enemy attacked they would take their entire family with them to see the battle. Wives and children would stand a few hundred yards behind the Galatian soldiers to remind the men that, if they lost, their enemy would then own their families. Talk about an incentive to wage war!

As fathers, we are still at war for our family 2,500 years later. Although we may not have a shield and spear, we do have other, better weapons at our disposal.

Here are 10 battles for your family—the modern family—that you must fight and win.

1. Security

Safety is more than a dead bolt on the door. The best security an All Pro Dad can give is the knowledge that he is there, that he is dependable, and that his love is stronger than a rock. Self-discipline for dad = security for the family.

2. Fidelity

Is your family #1 in your earthly affections? Your plans for the future? The investment of your time and treasures? Your passion? If your family is not your priority, then you have a battle for fidelity and you’re going to have to win this one for sure. This is a battle about leadership.

3. Decency

Dads, we’re on the front lines with this one. We’re not talking prudishness here so much as respect and the fight against objectification. This battle begins with nurturing a positive self-concept and a firm grasp of the value and dignity of all God’s children. More leadership for dad.

4. Safety

The battle for a safe society begins with secure families, a confidence in what’s right and wrong, and a willingness to build community in the neighborhood. Isolationism declares defeat. Building community is a move toward victory.

5. Solvency

Winning this fight is key to your family’s future. First, pledge to never spend more than you earn. Then, work hard to retire your debt. If we lose this one we’re selling our kids down the river.

6. Peace

This battle runs a lot deeper than the Middle East and Homeland Security. If there’s tension in your home, if there’s bullying at school, or if there are broken relationships that we ignore, then there’s no peace, no security, and no sense of safety for our kids. The cliché goes like this, “Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.” It became a cliché because it’s so true.

7. Health

This could be its own 10-Ways list. Obesity and Type-2 Diabetes used to be reserved for older adults. In the past decade the diseases have become prevalent in children. The Centers for Disease Control are now involved. Eliminating obesity alone would free up the medical resources necessary to provide universal health coverage at no additional cost. Your family can fight this battle and win.

8. Education

The nation’s top educators agree that the team leader in any conversation about schooling must be the parent(s). Any number of factors account for the challenge it has become for kids to receive a solid education. Adequate sleep, home support, a balanced diet, a stable environment and educational enrichment are within the grasp of your family. Teaching children? Training children? Dads, Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Star Ship Enterprise said it best: “Make it so.”

9. Balance

We know the way things look around us. No family communication. Ten-plus hours of media saturation daily. Close to zero incidence of family mealtime in the average week. The disappearing act that used to be family vacation. Televisions in the kids’ bedrooms. But that doesn’t mean we throw our hands in the air and fold. Fight the battle for a family ethos defined by balance. Be deliberate and your kids will thank you.

10. Future

The future may be full with uncertainty, but we can win the battle for the future of the family if we take on these other battles now. The future is ours to take, but if we want to win the future, then the battle is now.

New Frontiers: The Rough Road - Lessons from the Life of Moses

2011-06-20T13:40:00.000-07:00

Our new wagon-train theme has begun in the CW Playhouse. Yesterday, Cookie taught the kids a thing or two about the power of our words. Using food, of course, our wacky wagon-train cook talked about words that are healthy and words that are damaging. Pastor Kevin added a few points to that and there was some good altar worship as the kids repented of their hurtful words and asked God for his strength to forgive those who have hurt them with words.

This was only the first of our summer-long series on the life of Moses. This will be a series focusing on overcoming bad circumstances in our lives and trusting God to get us through as we move from Genesis into Exodus and focus on the hardships and subsequent deliverance of the Children of Israel. This week we focused on Jacob's final words to his sons before his death as the Hebrews settle in Egypt. Next week, we pick up 400 years later and the enslavement of God's chosen people.

A Practical Way to Teach Values

2011-06-20T13:38:00.000-07:00

Here's a practical and effective way to teach values in your family: explain the reasons behind your rules.

When you think of rules, you may just think of a list of do's and don'ts that you are trying to impress upon your children. Rules can be much more than that though. They can be used as the vehicle to communicate values to your children. When rules are implemented and used correctly, children will learn not only to say "Excuse me" before interrupting a conversation, but more importantly, they will learn to respect others and see the value of listening to others first before speaking.

Ask yourself why you require your five-year-old to stay in the yard or your teenager to check in regularly. These are safety issues and develop a sense of accountability to others.

Why do you ask your son to make his bed every day or your daughter to clean and vacuum her room on Saturday? It has to do with the value of neatness and self discipline. Take time to talk about the values, not just the rules.

We all have values that we somehow wish our children would develop and take on as their own. As they grow, our children will evaluate our values and choose the ones they understand and can relate to. You have a window of opportunity with your children in which you can teach them the values that you embrace.

Rules are values put into action. They show children what values look like, how to put them into practice, and why they are important. If we want our children to embrace our values, we need to teach them what these values are and how to implement them in their lives. Rules become a good vehicle to teach children the things that are most important to us.

While you're pondering this idea, consider some of the reasons for the rules God has for his children. It's a good way to connect with the things that are most valuable to God and his family.

This tip comes from the CD Series, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Last Call for Early Discount Camp Registrations!

2011-06-14T11:23:00.001-07:00

We've only received ONE registration form so far for Kids Summer Camp at Spencer Lake in August! So I'm putting out a final plea to turn in those registration forms ASAP for the early bird discount! I'll extend it through this week since I was out of town last week on vacation, but then it will cost more. If you have a child going into 3rd grade through 5th grade, they are invited to join us for a week of incredible fun and powerful spiritual experiences at Spencer Lake camp in Waupaca from August 8th - 12th. You can't beat the price for 5 days worth of fun and full room and board included! So don't delay! If you have questions, contact Aimee or myself.

Here's a link to the official web page where you can check out lots of pictures from previous years and some cool promo videos that are guaranteed to get your kids pumped!

http://www.e-discipleship.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=120&Itemid=22

You can also print up extra forms from this link if you need to, though we have many more here at the church.

A Three-Column Plan

2011-06-14T11:21:00.000-07:00

Parents sometimes feel that because their child is a challenge that they, as parents, are the problem. "If I would just do the right things then I wouldn't have this problem with my child," they say. Of course, we, as parents do have a lot of influence on our children, but it's certainly not the whole story.

Children aren't robots; they're people who have wills of their own. You can influence but not control them. That's why parents must be praying for their kids often. God uses you, as a parent, to mold your child. As you work on the heart you will benefit from developing a character development plan uniquely tailored for each child.

Here’s an idea: Fold a piece of paper to make three columns. In column one, list unwanted behaviors you see in your child. In many cases this is a long list but that's okay. Putting the problem on paper often helps sort it out. In the second column try to group the behaviors into character issues. We find that challenging children often lack qualities like self control, sensitivity, perseverance, and gentleness, just to name a few.

In the third column identify positive character qualities as headings and then specific behaviors you'd like to see to replace those unwanted behaviors. Taking this information, develop a strategy to motivate your child to make small changes.

Whatever you do, don't show the paper to your child. That's too much for any one person to see. Choose one character quality to work on and look for positive ways to correct as well as proactive ways to teach the new character quality.

You'll be surprised at the small steps of progress you'll see. But it's those steps of progress that will encourage you and your child. After all, in many homes children are making small steps of progress in the wrong direction so turning things around is a tremendous blessing.

If you'd like help developing an Action Plan for your child, consider being a featured parent in a webinar with Dr. Scott Turansky. Or, learn more about this six-step character development plan in our book, Home Improvement, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Ugly Tie Contest Off to a Rocky Start.

2011-06-13T14:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was supposed to be the beginning of our Ugly Tie Fundraiser but we only had 3 ties turned in and they were hardly noticed without a table full of ties to draw attention! If this fundraiser is going to bring in some funds for missions, we've got to have more ties to generate some excitement and energy! Maybe you just forgot without ol' PK around to remind you. That's OK, but the sooner you get them in the more time people will have to vote with their cash, so try to bring them in as soon as possible, like by Wednesday night! Our fundraising efforts so far this year have been lackluster. Not sure what's happening, but there just doesn't seem to be much participation. Everyone needs to contribute if we're going to be successful!

HOPE TO SEE THOSE TIES COME FLYING IN SOON!

It's VBS Crunch Time!!!

2011-06-13T14:13:00.000-07:00

This Wednesday night we launch our Summer VBS starting at our new Summer time, 6:15pm! Don't miss the fun as we go to Camp Moosefeather Falls! This Wednesday, kids will meet Kodiak Bear, the Eccentric Camp Nature Guide, and the Camp Storyteller, as well as make a cool craft project using CDs and sox! Lots of fun for every "camper" so don't miss out!

IMPORTANT NOTE: There is a small group meeting at the church tonight at 6:30pm to decorate for VBS and they need help so if you'd like to give them a hand, come on out! Make a family project of it!

Addressing Selfishness

2011-06-13T14:10:00.000-07:00

At least part of the solution for a child's selfishness is to learn how to be a servant. Our culture tends to not like that term, but any good employer, spouse, or team player knows how to give up his or her agenda for others at times. That's servanthood.

Children need to learn how to be servants. It's not an elective; it's a required course. Learning to be a servant will help children be better employees, better husbands or wives, and even better parents. It may be helpful to make servanthood a focus for a week or a month in your home. You might create a poster giving a working definition of servanthood that goes something like this:

--Seeking to overcome self-centeredness by looking for ways to help and care for others.

Or for younger children:

--Looking for ways to make other people happy before me.

You might have everyone in the family memorize a verse from the Bible like Philippians 2:4, "Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

Plan ways that each person can practice being a servant. As a parent, you are already serving your children in more ways that they probably appreciate. In fact, you might ask your child to serve by taking on one of the tasks you usually do in family life. This gives opportunity for you to model appreciation for service.

A child might plan and prepare a meal for the family for example. That's more complicated than many children realize. The work required to think of others may be just what some children need to get out of their own selfish patterns. Of course, those being served often respond with delight and appreciation, the built in reward for servanthood. This kind of role reversal can go a long way to teach children to value others and appreciate the things people do for them.

This tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

FAMILY WEEK BEGINS! Turn in those Ugly Ties this week!

2011-06-01T15:16:00.000-07:00

This Sunday is our monthly Family Service. There will be no Kids Church. Of course, that means that next week is Family Week and there will be no mid-week services either. So the Robinson family is taking this opportunity to go on vacation. Please pray for travelling mercies as we are driving our old van all the way to Florida. She's in tip-top shape but she's got 166,000 miles on her.

We'll be back in time for Kids church on the 12th and then VBS launches on the 15th! You'll be able to pre-register your kids again this Sunday out in the foyer. Maggie Graff and her girls will be there to help you out.

FINALLY: While we're gone on vacation we need the rest of you to get those old ties and decorate them for our Ugly Tie Fundraiser which will begin on June 12th also... that is IF we get some ties to display! If you've got yours done, just turn them into the church office. Darlene will put them in my office. Make sure you mark your tie so we know who made each one. (It also helps to pre-tie them before decorating, by the way.)

See you all in 10 days!

What is a Heart Moment?

2011-06-01T15:15:00.000-07:00

A heart moment is a special connection that takes place inside of your child's heart, or in your own heart, or both, that confirms a step of progress. Sometimes the heart moment just reminds you of the significance of your parenting role. Other times the heart moment helps you feel close to your child in a unique and powerful way. For some, a heart moment is when the light bulb comes on in your child that says, "I finally get it, Dad."

Sometimes heart moments just happen, but many times they are the result of intentional effort on the part of hard-working parents. You do the daily work of parenting because you know it's the right thing to do. Along the way you're trying to teach values and life lessons, but most of the time you're just trying to get the things done that have to be done today.

Some parents have longed for heart change for months or years and seem to have given up on any significant developments. Then a heart moment comes along to provide encouragement that yes, there is hope that this child may actually grow to maturity someday.

Tears are often associated with heart moments, further revealing the extent of their importance to parents. Usually they bring tears of deep joy, but sometimes it’s amazement, admiration, gratefulness, pride, or just the intense satisfaction of feeling close. When a heart moment overwhelms you with emotion, it’s important to express what you're feeling to your child. It's in those times when children can often catch the significance of their choices, that they've made an important decision or action that has deeply touched Mom or Dad.

Be on the lookout for heart moments. They are the reward of parenting and often result in teachable opportunities with your child.

This parenting tip comes from the book Family Heart Moments, True and Inspiring Stories by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Final Awana Club Celebration Night (and VBS Team meeting)!

2011-05-31T11:25:00.000-07:00

This Wednesday night we celebrate the end of an INCREDIBLE Awana club year! Don't let your kids miss out on the fun that their leaders have prepared for them... and they don't even have to work on their handbooks!!

Also, if you are helping us out with VBS this summer, please don't forget to join us for the VBS Team meeting at the same time on Wednesday night in the church library! We'll be going over how VBS will run and specific duties for all the different positions volunteers will be filling. Bring your questions and be here by 6:30pm!

Recognizing Foolishness

2011-05-31T10:58:00.000-07:00

One of the greatest sources of sibling conflict is foolishness. Children often don't recognize the future consequences of their present actions. Billy trips his younger sister. Karen teases her brother until he cries. These are examples of children not anticipating the consequences of their actions.

Foolishness is one of the three roadblocks to sibling harmony. Honor offers the solution. Honor teaches wisdom in relationships

One of the ways that you can recognize foolishness is to listen for the flags. Excuses like, "I was just kidding" or "I didn't mean it" or "I was just playing around" or "I didn't do anything wrong" are all cues that a child is not taking responsibility for foolish behavior. Children often evaluate life in terms of black and white and when they do something foolish the behavior may not have been wrong. These children don't recognize that a good behavior can sometimes be wrong because it leads to something bad.

The first solution is to help children learn to take responsibility for their part of the problem. This is hard for many children who view mistakes as a sign of weakness. Help children take responsibility for foolishness and you will go a long way to teach them about wisdom.

You might ask, "What could you have done differently to avoid this problem?" This question helps children look at an offense a little differently. Instead of evaluating it based on right or wrong, now the behavior is judged based on its foresight and wisdom.

Of course the solution for foolishness is to help children learn wisdom. You want to help them anticipate the consequences of their actions. Tell stories of people who didn't see what was coming. And of course pray with your children because God says in James 1:5, "If you lack wisdom, ask God."

This tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Graduation/Awards Sunday!

2011-05-26T19:43:00.000-07:00

This Sunday we honor our graduates and give out Awana club awards so don't let your kids miss out on this important weekend, especially if they've completed a book this year or if they are graduating from one level to the next. We will honor our pre-school graduates going from the Animal Kingdom Nurseries into the CW Playhouse & Awana. We will also honor our C.H.R.I.S.T. WORKS Graduates going into SWAT! Of course, Pastor Nick will be honoring his High School graduates and any college grads as well. We will also be giving out clubber of the year awards for Awana to the kid in each club who had near perfect attendance and earned the most total points for the entire year.

So we hope you'll join us for this extra special family service. Pastor Nick will be bringing the commencement message!

ALSO: This Sunday begins VBS pre-registration for the kids. Stop by our table in the foyer and sign your kids up.

Firmness with Relationship

2011-05-26T19:40:00.000-07:00

Children and parents should be friends, but don't let that desire weaken your limit-setting. One mom of three teens said, "I used to feel bad when I had to say 'No' because I thought they'd be mad at me. Now I've learned to make a decision and enforce it because it's the right thing to do. They may get angry, but I have to do it because I'm their mom. After they settle down, they know I did it for their own good."

Firmness doesn't need to be cold and distant. Eye contact, gentle words, and extra time can add a personal touch to parenting that helps children feel valued. Putting your hand on your son's shoulder, calling your daughter close to give an instruction, addressing a child by name, and speaking softly are all ways to show children that they're important. Children are not possessions to order around with harshness—they're treasures to treat with honor. Sometimes we have to respond, "I'm sorry but I have to say no."

Nagging and harshness, are relationship-damaging patterns and require retraining of both children and parents. Children must learn to respond to different cues, and parents must learn other habits of giving instructions or warnings. Changing habits is not easy and requires self-discipline, courage, and humility. The work, though, provides parents with one of the skills that demonstrates honor-based parenting."

This tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Last Official Awana Club Night for Passing Book Sections!

2011-05-24T11:40:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the last REGULAR club night for Awana!! It's the LAST CHANCE to get checked off in books before our big Award/Graduation service this upcoming Sunday! So encourage your kids to work extra hard tonight and tomorrow to finish up their books for the year and we'll see them tomorrow night at 6:30 ready to go!

NEXT WEEK IS THE ACTUAL LAST NIGHT OF AWANA, BUT THERE WILL BE NO HANDBOOK TIME!

Ugly Tie Decorating Time! Have your kids started yet?

2011-05-23T11:50:00.000-07:00

Don't forget to help your kids find an old tie and start decorating it for display starting June 12th! This will be our next BGMC fundraiser. As always, we will display each tie with a buddy barrel and encourage people to vote for their favorite tie by putting money in the barrel. The tie that makes the most money will be worn by Pastor Kevin on July 3rd when he preaches in adult service! The other pastors will showcase top money-making ties as well, so encourage your kids to get started on designing their BGMC tie and turn them in by family week here at the church.

REMEMBER: Please don't make the ties messy on clothes and remember to pre-tie them BEFORE you decorate them!

A History Lesson on the Washington Monument (As Memorial Day Approaches)

2011-05-23T11:33:00.000-07:00

LAUS DEO

Do you know what it means?

One detail that is never mentioned is that in Washington, D.C., there can never be a building of greater height than the Washington Monument.

With all the uproar about removing the ten commandments, etc., this is worth a moment or two of your time. I was not aware of this amazing historical information.

On the aluminum cap, atop the Washington Monument in Washington , D.C.., are displayed two words: Laus Deo.

No one can see these words. In fact, most visitors to the monument are totally unaware they are even there and for that matter, probably couldn't care less.

These words have been there for many years; they are 555 feet, 5.125 inches high, perched atop the monument, facing skyward to the Father of our nation, overlooking the 69 square miles which comprise the District of Columbia, capital of the United States of America.

Laus Deo! Two seemingly insignificant, unnoticed words. Out of sight and, one might think, out of mind, but very meaningfully placed at the highest point over what is the most powerful city in the most successful nation in the world.

So, what do those two words, in Latin, composed of just four syllables and only seven letters, possibly mean? Very simply, they say 'Praise be to God!'

Though construction of this giant obelisk began in 1848, when James Polk was President of the United States , it was not until 1888 that the monument was inaugurated and opened to the public. It took twenty-five years to finally cap the memorial with a tribute to the Father of our nation, Laus Deo 'Praise be to God!'

From atop this magnificent granite and marble structure, visitors may take in the beautiful panoramic view of the city with its division into four major segments. From that vantage point, one can also easily see the original plan of the designer, Pierre Charles l'Enfant - a perfect cross imposed upon the landscape, with the White House to the north, the Jefferson Memorial to the south, the Capitol to the east, and the Lincoln Memorial to the west.

A cross you ask? Why a cross? What about separation of church and state? Yes, a cross; separation of church and state was not, is not, in the Constitution. So, read on. How interesting and, no doubt, intended to carry a profound meaning for those who bother to notice.

Praise be to God! Within the monument itself are 898 steps and 50 landings. As one climbs the steps and pauses at the landings the memorial stones share a message.

On the 12th Landing is a prayer offered by the City of Baltimore ;
on the 20th is a memorial presented by some Chinese Christians;
on the 24th a presentation made by Sunday School children from New York and Philadelphia quoting Proverbs 10:7, Luke 18:16 and Proverbs 22:6. Praise be to God!

When the cornerstone of the Washington Monument was laid on July 4th, 1848 deposited within it were many items including the Holy Bible presented by the Bible Society. Praise be to God! Such was the discipline, the moral direction, and the spiritual mood given by the founder and first President of our unique democracy 'One Nation, Under God.'

When one stops to observe the inscriptions found in public places all over our nation's capitol, he or she will easily find the signature of God, as it is unmistakably inscribed everywhere you look. You may forget the width and height of 'Laus Deo ', its location, or the architects but no one who reads this will be able to forget its meaning, or these words: 'Unless the Lord builds the house its builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.' (Psalm 127: 1)

Special Family Service at the Lakefront Band Shell THIS SUNDAY!

2011-05-19T10:25:00.001-07:00

NO CW PLAYHOUSE (KIDS CHURCH) THIS SUNDAY!

SPECIAL FAMILY SERVICE WITH THE VINE AT THE LAKE FRONT!

HOTDOGS AND CHIPS AFTERWARD!

INVITE SOME FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS TO HEAR DEAN NIFORATOS!

2 Weeks of Awana left! Finish those books!

2011-05-18T13:21:00.000-07:00

There are only 2 club nights left in the year before our big awards and graduation service next Sunday! So help your kids to push that little extra if they are close to finishing their book. We want to see as many kids as possible receive book awards next Sunday! In fact, if your child is close and committed to making it, you might want to give Aimee a heads-up on that when you check the kids in tonight so she knows to order their award. We have to put in the order tomorrow in order to receive them on time. So don't quit now. The finish line is in sight!

AWANA Spring Theme Night!

2011-05-18T13:04:00.000-07:00

Tonight we will be giving extra points to kids who are dressed in Spring colors and patterns! So remind them to dig out those bright pastels and flowers. Yes, this one will appeal more to the girls, but the boys can at least wear some bright colors and still be manly or at least "boyly." The fun begins at 6:30pm as always. See you then!

Encouraging Moments

2011-05-18T12:57:00.000-07:00

Kids have a way of speaking words of encouragement that create heart moments in a parent that are more significant than those children ever imagined. And God knows that we need that kind of support. Parenting is hard work, and hope is a cherished commodity that keeps parents moving forward when they feel like things are falling apart either in themselves or in their kids.

Children also have the ability to turn the things parents teach them into lessons for others, including you. On the one hand, it’s quite encouraging to see that your child is getting it, but on the other hand, it can be difficult to receive a rebuke from your child. Children have an uncanny way of sensing truth and proclaiming it. Maybe that's why God likens our own spiritual growth to be like a child growing up.

Even though parents are always learning and growing, understanding God's grace in its various forms is a challenge for even the most mature person. God uses hardship and trials to develop the character in a person's life. Romans 5:3-4 says, "Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." The struggles parents face within themselves and with their children are part of God's refining process.

God has many ways of sending parents messages of hope. They sometimes come through a scripture passage or a pastor's message. A husband or wife can be a great source of encouragement in family life, but there's something about God's use of a child that has the ability to go straight to your heart. It's those moments that parents can look back on and cherish during the difficult times.

This parenting tip comes from the book Family Heart Moments, True and Inspiring Stories by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

C.O.R.E. COMPLETED! 5 month focus on Core Values comes to an end.

2011-05-16T10:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, we completed our 5 month focus on the Prayer House Core Values in kids church!

With the Bandshell service this coming Sunday and a special Graduation/Awards ceremony the following week, our C.O.R.E. series came to an end a bit early but it's been a grand run! For our final lesson, we surprised the kids with a final visit from P.K. Baracus of the J-Team since his commando specialty is Souls! P.K. helped Chuck Foo's student, Jen Soo with some tips on witnessing to even the meanest of people like a bully in her Martial Arts class.

The kids also saw how God works in the lives of some of the worst sinners through the life of Joseph and his brothers. Then we ended the service by praying for salvation and by praying for the meanest individuals we could think of in our lives and trusting God to use us to reach even them!

We hope you'll encourage your kids to invite their friends to the Band Shell this coming Sunday and that God will use your family to reach the lost in your neighborhood and sphere of influence! Let's glorify God and reach his precious children... even the mean ones who need Him most!

See you, next month as we finish out the life of Joseph and move into Exodus with Cookie, the Wagon-Train chef! More coming on that in upcoming weeks...

Some Tips for Helping Kids Deal with Anger

2011-05-16T09:58:00.000-07:00

Anger damages relationships. We help parents every week in our office deal with anger in their families. Here are several guidelines we've found helpful for anger management in a home. When parents and kids work on these things, anger episodes are reduced. Make these a regular part of your routine and you'll see tremendous progress.

1. Never argue with children who are angry. Have them take a break and continue the conversation later.

2. Identify the anger cues that reveal your child is about to lose control. Point them out early and stop the interaction. Don’t wait for explosions before you intervene.

3. Help children recognize anger in its various disguises like a bad attitude, grumbling, glaring, or a harsh tone of voice.

4. Debrief after the child has settled down. Talk about how to handle the situation differently next time.

5. Teach children constructive responses. They could get help, talk about it, or walk away. These kinds of suggestions help children to have a plan for what they should do, not just what they shouldn't do.

6. When angry words or actions hurt others, individuals should apologize and seek forgiveness.

By doing these things you will teach your children to do what James 1:19 says, "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

This tip comes from the chapter on sibling conflict in the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

10 Things to Teach Your Son about True Manhood

2011-05-04T09:12:00.000-07:00

OK, for whatever reason, this article doesn't want to format properly, so here is the original link to the All Pro Dad website:

http://www.allprodad.com/top10/parenting/10-things-to-teach-your-son-about-true-manhood

Our culture (especially “pop-culture”) is, typically, dead wrong about this topic!Check out the role models readily available to kids today: The Internet, movies, television, music, magazines, the sports world and politics. There’s a huge pile of information available and “ideals” presented, but precious little that’s much short of flat-out harmful.

So let’s not leave this one to chance, dads. Be all over this list, think about what it means to engage “True Manhood”, and let’s begin to take responsibility for what Junior is exposed to.

You are the # 1 role model for your child! Like it or not, it’s a fact, and there’s not much you can do except make sure you’re the best. Living manhood out loud is one of our primary responsibilities as dads. Seriously, there’s a lot that can be done, and kids with proactive dads are going to be head and shoulders ahead.

For starters, here’s All Pro Dad’s list of 10 things to teach your son about true manhood.

1. Being a gentleman is still worth the effort:

- Hold the door.
- Stand up when a woman leaves or joins the table.
- Walk on the “splash” side of the sidewalk.
- Attempt (gently) to pick up the tab.
- Go get the car when it’s raining.
- Offer your hand…

2. At the same time, be respectful: All the above “gentlemanly” actions must be offered subtly, and - if necessary - set aside graciously when refused.

3. Take responsibility: In a word (well, two), “step up.” True manhood takes responsibility for its actions, choices, values and beliefs. And – while taking responsibility, manhood is also willing to admit – with grace - when it is wrong.

4. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable: Real strength allows other people in. Manhood is honest about feelings and not afraid to be known. True manhood never builds a wall where there should be a window, or a fortress where there should be a sanctuary.

5. Actually “being” a man is more important than “talking” like one: Real men don’t just stand up and speak up - they “put up” too. Loud talk and tough posturing don’t cut it. True manhood involves finding a need and doing something about it. Real men don’t complain about social problems – they go out and do something about them. Real men don’t point fingers – they work for solutions. Real men get calluses on their hands – not from flapping their lips.

6. Listen respectfully, disagree politely and never exclude women from conversation: True manhood is inclusive. It may be strong, but it’s unfailingly polite. Men who equate bluster or machismo with strength are typically covering something up. Men who think women have nothing to contribute to the conversation need to wake up and smell the 21^st Century.

7. Love is stronger than muscles: True manhood understands that brute force is less compelling than self-giving love. The best solutions to difficulties involved applied love.

8. The first shall be last: True manhood puts others first. Jesus is quoted more than once as saying something like this: If you want to be a leader, then the place to be is on your knees, with a towel in your hand, washing someone’s feet.

9. Manhood is – sometimes - more about what you could do but didn’t than what you could have avoided but did anyway: There’s a lot of restraint – a great deal of “Quiet Strength” in true manhood. Real men tend to always have something in reserve.

10. True manhood is more about giving than about getting: Our culture often touts a “men see what they want, then they go out and get it” view of manhood. But true manhood is more along the lines of “see what the world needs, then go out and do it.” Strength leveraged for the benefit of others.

C.O.R.E. Lesson 12: How Can I Keep From Sinning?

2011-04-25T13:19:00.000-07:00

Chuck Foo learns a thing or two about resisting sin when his "Kung-Fu Breaking Apparatus" (a simple piece of paper) fails to break (rip) for him and he gets angry at his assistant, Jen Soo (who easily rips it and makes him look bad). The Kung-Fu master had to learn right along with the kids how Joseph avoided sin as a servant to Potiphar. Ask your kids what steps they learned to avoid sinning in their lives.